Chess Koans

 Traditional Zen Koans

 1)   What is the sound of one hand clapping?

 2)   A pilgrim traveled many months to reach the monastery of the Zen Master.  When he arrived, he asked the master:  "May I become your student?  I want to spend the rest of my life here, seeking enlightenment."

       The master said "Have you eaten your rice?"

       The pilgrim said "Yes."

       "Then wash your bowl."

        The pilgrim said "Ah."  And he left, enlightened.

Anybody got any chess koans?

I'll start:

A student was playing chess on his phone during a class.

The teacher called on the student and asked him what he was doing.

The student replied that he was trying to master the game.

The teacher said, "There exists a state in which you will not attempt to master the game, and the game will not attempt to master you."

The student asked, "What is this state?"

The teacher said, "Give me your phone, and I will show you."

The student gave him the phone, and the teacher threw it to the ground, breaking it into pieces. The student was enlightened.

If you have ice cream I will give it to you...

If you have no ice cream I will take it way from you...

This is an ice cream koan ^_^

lol -- I'll accept that because it's clever, and I'm willing to assume the ice cream looks like the top part of a bishop or a pawn or something chess-like. 

Thank you for this thought.  I shall meditate on this for the rest of the day.  If I have not achieved enlightment by the end of the day, however, I will forget about it.

Thank you for your comment.  At first glance, it appears to be a non sequitor.  And knowing you (), I was not surprised.  Also, in it's apparent irrelevance, your "koan" does fit into the spirit of this forum.  I shall meditate on this as well. ()

If a king falls over, but no one is there to see it, does it mean that it loses?

If a king falls into a box with no pawns ..... wait ... I'm still working on it ... I'm Almost enlighted ...... (more later)

When darkness falls, knight ensues

;)

When knight ("N") falls in opposing king's territory and breaks leg, "knight N sues."

(I apologize for that.  Very bad.  Must go back to meditating.)

What, where?

We shall have no "dissin' " in the Zen forum.  For we are as one with the Universe.  Ommm.

Hmm. I'll try that: ommmmmm...

Erm. What's next after 'ommmmmm...'?

Ok. I will

mmmm....

Master, does chess have Buddha nature? - Check.

even in an impossible position, there is a solution

you're all enlightened now

Joe_Blob wrote:

brumtown: ummmmmm.Are you from Birning Ham? 

No. But I am from Birmingham!!

1.e4#

Joe_Blob wrote:

Exactly! Cockney rhyming slang. 

Yes. Except us brummies pronounce 'Birmingham' like 'Birming um'.