Disconnects vs resigning - what's the point?

@IMBacon

Thanks - seems like you've thought about this a bit. I appreciate the responses.

There are quite a few threads about resignation etiquette here, but I haven't yet found a reasonable answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe and Everything:

What on earth is the point in just disconnecting, or stalling, vs resigning when the game is over?

I have a beer fridge in my office, and plenty of other things to work on. I once finished making a picture frame - triple compound miters are a b*tch - while waiting on a 10 minute game to time out.

My question is: WHY do people do this? Assuming they don't care that it's severely rude - time is the only resource we can't reclaim - what is the point? It's not like they lose fewer points that way.

If I get down to a completely indefensible position, I'll resign to save us both time so that we can get onto another game, or analysis. If I think I can get a draw, I keep playing until it happens or becomes clear that it's not going to. I NEVER "suffer intermittent Internet connectivity" or just walk away and leave the other person stewing. (Well, almost never: if the other player is being incredibly abusive in chat, I might just let them stew a bit.)

Thoughts?

@MickinMD First of all, thank you for the eloquent, considered response.

"a psychological problem going on."?

Care to elaborate? Given the earlier comment about "mental problems"...

My oldest (9) is autistic, and we have a number of other "mental" issues in the family. No one in the group that I'm thinking of acts this way.

Also, being a poor loser isn't a psychological problem. It is, in my opinion, a function of prior experience and (too extreme, or utter lack of) consequences. Someone who is never allowed to lose at home may be miffed the first time it happens elsewhere, but that doesn't necessarily indicate any sort of clinical disorder. (Though, admittedly, I am not an MD.)

My experience with sports was quite the opposite: parents screaming at coaches, kids getting 'A's in Calculus who couldn't spell "derivative" (literally). I don't fault *sports activities*, but too many parents make that the end-all and be-all of their kid's school experience at the expense of actually learning anything.

This has gotten off topic. Apologies.

I would never resign a winning position, just to save a few minutes and give some dickbag the satisfaction of knowing his dickbag plan worked the way he wanted it to.  

forked_again,

You are correct that allowing players to win through stalling is just encouraging bad behavior.  As for my socialist comment,  We both live in the US and you must see the political divisions getting wider and uglier.  Conservatives tend to emphasize the depravity of man, while Liberals are sometimes to optimistic about our better natures.  As time has worn on we have developed large numbers of people who brazenly blame the poor for their plight, while others deny the need for more personal responsibility.  Years ago we had a strong middle class and most of society cared about everyone else, but now it is just a war. 

Hey Techvette,

Sorry about your kid's autism.  I also have a handicapped child.  But I don't think you should take so seriously use of the phrase "mental problems" or "psychological problems" to describe people who lack basic interpersonal skills, are rude, passive aggressive, overly aggressive, or in other ways anti-social.  Its not meant to be a clinical diagnosis or a comparison with people who do have clinically defined illnesses.  There is something wrong with the way these type of people think (at least in the opinion of the user of the phrase).  So, I see it as just a general observation, not to be taken as a comparison or any disrespect to people with other issues not related to the type of behavior I listed above.