I was really expecting to find a lot of nonsense here, but I find myself agreeing with Kasporov_jr to a great extent. If you don't want that sort of attention, simply don't solicit it, especially on a chess-specific site.
for all the girls on chess.com.....
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Apr 27, 2014
0
#62
Kasporov_Jr wrote:
xxPrincess_Beckyxx wrote:
So you're saying that just because I have a picture of myself as my avatar that I'm asking to be harrassed?? It's exactly that kind of attitude which is the main reason a lot of girls are put off from coming here in the first place, or choose to quit the site if they do.
Fortunately I don't allow guys like you to deter me from enjoying the game that I love to play, which I have the right to play without being harrassed by idiotic guys.
dont worry honey, no guys is even going to think about messaging you; your exempt.
Oh really ?? well for your information I've had plenty of guys messaging me although only 1 I've ever needed to report. Most people I've spoken to here are polite and friendly why are you being so offensive?? stop acting like a little boy and grow up!
Apr 27, 2014
0
#64
I agree with Batgirl, scantily clad female avi's are there to attract attention on a predominantly male chess site. There are personal settings that can be set if you don't want unsolicited messaging and if you do, they can be reported. There you have it Kasparov... you have people agreeing with you. I think you need to start a more contentious thread.
It's all pretty obvious stuff really.
How about some hunky guy avatars?
i thought kasporov was a big fan of pussy riot ?
Everything's fine.
Apr 27, 2014
0
#68
Again, Ive had 8 female friends close their accounts because of idiots. NONE of them had provacitive avatars, although some did post some pics of themselves and their family (children, babies). One had a pic of a kitten for an avatar for crying out loud.
NONE deserved that kind of treatment.
And they wonder why most chess players are considered socially handicapped....
I've been or am a member of several other sites (non-chess) that have male dominated and I've never seen any woman on these sites driven off by boys behaving badly.
Apr 27, 2014
0
#71
I can say in all honesty that in my nearly 7 years here I recall only one instance where a member spoke inappropriately, and then mildly so, to me. He must have followed my suggestion to get lost because I hadn't heard from him since. But I don't invite such interaction which is why I would gather I never have to deal with it. I can't imagine anyone being bothered who doesn't invite, encourage or accept it.
Optimissed wrote:
I agree with Kasparov. I tried to change my avatar to an old bucket but chess.com doesn't want to let me so I have to put up with being hit on all the time by the females even tho I'm a 62 year old man and, of course, completely past it. I'm such a victim, it's terrible! I just have to respect the fact that I'm gorgeous ... :)
Strangely enough she's married to one of my friends!
Apr 27, 2014
0
#74
Kasporov_Jr wrote:
why do you act so surpised when guys try hitting on you/try flirting with you all the time? Your in a website that is 95% filled with men, and we all know boys will be boys. It's just human nature for men to always be looking out for a female especially when a large percentage of the males here in chess.com are between 16-30, where a man it at his prime filled with testesterone.
I am not saying it is right for a guy to harrass you on here, but please respect the fact that you will always be targeted as a female & treated differently ( sometimes better or worse). If you have a provoking avatar of a picture of yourself, you are just asking for it......
It is like this in every single part of the internet, every online video game, every online messageboard. So unless you hide the fact that you are a female, you will always get hit on by other men. Seriously just look at any female chess.com member, they have 100x more homepage views than a guy does.
Ummm... No comment.
Yes, this brings back memories of the Julio Iglesias song with Willie Nelson: Ahem, let me clear my throat. Ok, here we go now. Mike check, mike check...... To all the girls I've loved before, who've traveled in & out my door............... I'm glad they came along, I dedicate this thread, to all the girls I loved before.
Thank you, thank you all. Good night.
SamHellerman wrote:
Is this post for fucking real?
Did this guy really just utter the words "please respect the fact that you will be targeted"??
I usually say something like "thank you for providing such a clear illustration of exactly what is wrong with the world today," but sometimes I can't muster feelings of gratitude for such garbage.
I think the OP is in fact being inconsiderate, but I think you would be jumping to conclusions too quickly if you were to think he means that he likes girls getting hurt or something; that if a girl got hurt, he would celebrate.
I think it's more that he thinks there are ways to discourage guys acting that way that women perhaps voluntarily ignore.
Of course, that view has some problems with it, since it seems to be making females responsible for what the guys are doing (the person who actually does the thing should be pretty responsible I would think!), but I wouldn't go as far to say that he outright likes girls being hurt.
And if someone gets robbed, it's the mugger who is in the wrong. It doesn't mean you should go into dark alleys at night.
If kasporov went to a football match, maybe he'd choose the partition between rival sets of fans and politely let the opposition fans know that they shouldn't be surprised if they all get beat up outside the stadium if his side doesn't win.
I'm not sure I'd mind a few "cat calls" -- I'd be willing to grab some confidence even if I would have to be annoyed in the process. Plus then I could feel morally awesome when I stand up to them :) Also some of the guys might actually be respectful with the comments, then it's a win-win.
Probably works better online -- offline, in the real world... well, guys are willing to do some really violent things :(
As an actual female this thread alarms me. This is a chess site. Is my gender really an issue? I have to agree girls...don't come on all girlish and then complain of the attention.
If you are nodding, you are a bigoted male with cynical thoughts.