Funniest Chess Joke

This is the one of the funniest chess jokes I have ever seen

I've seen funnier:

A chess master died - after a few days, a friend of his heard a voice; it was him!
"What's it like, where you are now," he asked.
"What do you want to hear first, the good news or the bad news."
"Tell me the good news first."
"Well, it's really heaven here. There are tournaments and blitz sessions going on all the time and Morphy, Alekhine, Lasker, Tal, Capablanca, Botvinnik, they're all here, and you can play them."
"Fantastic!" the friend said, "and what is the bad news?"
"You have Black against Capablanca on Saturday."

@2Ke21-0 Interesting mine is shorter but that one is a classic!

Yup xD

You've probably heard this one, but

A man was playing chess in a park against his dog. Someone walks by and says "That's one smart dog you have!"

The man says "not really, I'm ahead 3 games to one."

Nice everyone, keep sharing this post!!

I really like the dead chessmaster one!  And it's amazing, so far it's a joke thread where all the jokes are actually funny!

Alekhine died and showed up at the Pearly Gates, hoping to get in. St Peter shook his head sadly and said "Sorry Mr Alekhine... we don't allow chess players into Heaven". Just then Alekhine spotted Bogoljubov sitting at a table inside the gates, swilling ice-cold beer. "Well, what about HIM?" Alekhine demanded. St Peter glanced back, saw Bogoljubov, and replied "Oh, he just THINKS he's a chess player".

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Post your best chess jokes

Here's a classic:

The big chess tournament was taking place at the Plaza in New York at around Christmas. After the first day's competition, many of the winners were sitting around in the lobby of the hotel talking about their matches and bragging about their wonderful play. After a few drinks they started getting louder and louder until finally, the desk clerk couldn't take any more and kicked them out.

The next morning the Manager called the clerk into his office and told him there had been many complaints about his being so rude to the hotel guests....instead of kicking them out, he should have just asked them to be less noisy. The clerk responded, "I'm sorry, but if there's one thing I can't stand, it's chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

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