Giving up chess because it wastes my time. Feeling guilt about it.

Hi,

First of all I'm a complete noob. I've taken chess seriously for the past year or so. Took lessons online, analyzed my games, solved puzzles and pretty much everything we're told to become better players.

But honestly sometimes when I'm in the middle of a study I pause for a bit and start questioning whether I really should be doing this.

I know this could be offensive to some of the hardcore chess fans in here, but wouldn't it be better if I instead use that time to improve my skills in programming or machine learning? (that's what I do for living)

I'm gonna be honest. I do not enjoy the game. Not because I think it's a bad game, on the contrary I love chess. I just don't enjoy playing it because

- every time I lose I feel completely stupid for all these basic blunders.

- every time I win I feel like I don't really deserve the win because my opponent was a noob (no offense).

And the fact is, at my level these are the only options to feel because I AM a noob and everyone I play IS a noob.

And to not become a noob will take so much time and I really think all the hours I spend on chess every day could improve my career.

Do I give up chess? Please don't be offended and don't be biased to chess.

I've felt the same way. Usually it's after studying, and I feel unhappy and that I'm wasting my time.

Even at a tournament, I've though to myself, I don't like this, maybe this will be my last tournament.

I mean, I've improved a lot since I was a beginner, but I used to really enjoy doing e.g. tactics for 3-4 hours straight. Or analyzing random positions from games for hours.

Should you improve skills relevant to your career?

Maybe, but I feel like everyone needs a hobby where they can just relax and do a simple activity. Chess can be that too by the way. Some people have tens of thousands of blitz games and they're still at beginner level. It's not about improvement, they're just having fun. Lately I've found it fun to make little drawings, mostly doodling, nothing fancy.

Oh, but feeling dumb when you lose, that's really unnecessary. Non-players are taught that chess is all about intelligence or being clever (after all we're never shown a movie where an idiot is beating chess players in the park, it's always some genius detective or something). In reality it's all about work. A lot of study, a lot of play, a lot of analysis. At first losing made me feel stupid too, but after my fist few 100 games I got over it. If you keep playing hopefully you can move past that too.

You don't enjoy the game. So I don't see any reason why you should continue to play something that you don't particularly like. It's just a board game, like Monopoly.

But if the problem is that your opponents know openings so you are always running uphill, then turn that around - try 960 Chess. You'll find it in the tournaments section, and there are clubs. The chess principles are the same but there's no opening theory. I hope you'll give it a try but good luck whatever you do. It's just a game (ducks for cover).

The fact that you don't enjoy playing chess is a good-enough reason to quit.

Unless you have time to spend, i would devote it to improve your programming or machine learning skills. Or to quote H. G. Wells; 

If you enjoy machine learning and programming more, then certainly go ahead and do so. However, losing a few games of chess is hardly a reason to quit the game altogether. 

Couldn't have put it better. And compared to me, you ARE (almost) a master.

The reason why chess is enjoyable is difficult to describe, since it lies somewhere between a physical sensation and an intellectual satisfaction.  If you really enjoy chess it is because you like being absolutely engaged by solving the unique sort of puzzles presented by the chess landscape and losing all awareness of your surroundings while concentrating on them.  You enjoy creating challenges for your opponent from your own appreciation of the problems difficult positions can present for you.  It is a sport of creating unsolvable positional paradoxes for the opponent, from which there is no escape without losing material or being checkmated. 

But since the OP describes chess in terms of somewhat far removed concerns about ego and status, since he feels he is playing at a low level and encountering opponents who are also at a low level, it seems that his appreciation of the game has drifted away from what really makes it enjoyable and even addictive.  Either he will regain that appreciation, or he should perhaps give up playing, at least for a while.  

Another typically good post from Luitpoldt

Only 300 Elo in 9 years? Isn't that rather poor by your own lofty standards? Just asking

Wise words 👍

  This is from the OP post 1;   " and I really think all the hours I spend on chess every day could improve my career".        ?? What CAREER might that be.?

Add another to those melancholy case histories entitled: never trust a chess player to accurately recount their improvement.

You/we have to come to grips with the fact that most of us won't become strong players. So if you don't like the game, there is nothing wrong with quitting.

There are only two reasons to stick to it: You really love the game in itself and/or you are really addicted to it. 

What?!

There was a time when promising young people (presumably meaning talented, intelligent, etc) went into politics?!

What a world that must have been!

Yeah, I'm not trying to start a fight.

I do hope most people would like to see some younger faces.

The average of a senator in the US is over 60 years old.

I mean... come on.

I've known some people in my life who I consider very intelligent. Great memory, quick wit, very knowledgeable, wise too, etc.

But a man is not who he once was at 70, 80 years old... and I mean no disrespect. Time comes for us all.

It is what Sky wrote.  The game is about thinking.

I know what you feel.  Sometimes I play so stupid moves, mostly because I am absolutely lazy to think,  and lose quickly against almost beginners.  Those opponents can't believe that I was able to lose,  as usually I am crushing all weak player. But the reason is simple: to believe that I will win just because I am am stronger and therefore can afford to stop thinking is ridiculous.

Perhaps you feel the same.  You are a little bit frustrated and ashamed about the gap that exists between what you should play and what you actually play.

I suggest you to stop any kind of game that is faster than one hour. Play Daily Chess, and make notes on your moves - all moves,  even the first ones!  Play two games simultaneously. And analyze these games.  I know it is hard to go through a game full of innacuracies and blunders. 

But look from this side: the more you are aware on your mistakes,  the more you will avoid them.  

Something else: if I am frustrated I stop playing and study only.  I do this in Chessable,  where I have other people learning the same books like me. We often discuss problems,  try together to understand strange opening moves,  etc.   Go there and begin to have fun on learning systematically and efficiently. I am playing chess because I want to have a hobby beside tennis,  something to stay mentally fit. 

   "I'm not even going to get into this because after our entire discussion on politics yesterday they just went and deleted the thread with no reason provided whatsoever".    DUH!   Do you know how many millions of times Staff has said......no politics....no religion in the main forums.  Also.....do you REALLY have to copy & paste,....and copy&paste.....and copy& paste?