Headaches!

Sometimes (unrelated to chess) I get migraines. For the context of chess though, cellomaster8 is right about not taking it too seriously. I recommend learning more chess themes, patterns, tactics etc. so you need to think less in a game. It is mind-boggling to see some GM look for 2 seconds and make a move stronger than if I spent my sweet time on the same position. The trick is learning patterns. A chess GM has a ton of patterns ingrained into their minds, so they don't need to spend too long on the exact position! If you can quickly identify the key elements of a position, then you do not need every detail sometimes - it is just technique from there. 

Unfortunately, this takes a lot of experience and practice. Of course, you may get less headaches.

I know you can learn tactics from chesstempo, but how do you go about learning "themes" and "patterns"? What are those?

when i play OTB if i do not use my glasses it gives to me a painful headache while on pc using glasses reading or doing something i can be normal without headache.

I don't play a lot OTB these days but I remember getting headaches the day after a game. I always put it down to mental tiredness and the nervous tension involved in playing, having to focus and calculate so hard for so long. I also seemed to get quite red faced and warm during the game itself, which again I put down to the stress the brain was under. Cant give you any tips but yeah Ive had similar and it was pretty much after every game.

also sudden high heartbeats per minute produce headache.

I keep getting a rush of anger and a desire to injure myself after losing

Like I punch myself in the head or drive my fingernails into my forehead or stomach. I hate feeling stupid because I already have so little self esteem outside of the game

"Patterns" and "Themes"/"Motifs" etc. are common operations in chess. An example is the common "back-rank mate" where you deliver checkmate on the back rank to a King trapped by its own friendly forces. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Checkmate_pattern#Back-rank_mate If a GM sees that the position may create a back-rank mate/threat, then they may plan accordingly via recognition of this pattern rather then discovering it over the board every time (and perhaps getting headaches). 

This is an easy example, but these patterns are not only limited to checkmate patterns. There are also theoretically won endgame situations (like Queen + King vs King), common pawn breaks/pushes in certain openings (Black playing an eventual f5 in the King's Indian Defense comes to mind), there are common tactics (like "pins" or "skewers") and so forth. A strong chess player can simply notice various elements of a position quicker and therefore make a stronger move as a result (often faster too) with less calculation/thinking and more intuition. 

Chess.com lessons are a great tool for this site; the underlining core of this are these "patterns" (sometimes called this and others implied, but they are there). I currently only solve the one free lesson per day, but even this helps. Take your time with these, think them through, and focus on learning the content rather than the artificial "lessons rating" and you will likely improve at chess. Tactics also help, and books on chess and so on; however do not use only one of these resources, but as many methods for learning as you can. 

These common "patterns", "themes", "pawn structures" and so on is really what chess is all about. You must first understand these if you want to truly improve at chess. 

Good luck

Oh no, don't feel that bad  

Chess has little to do with the stereotypical illusion of "intelligence" and more to do with pattern-recognition, ability to persevere, and creativity in solving new threats and goals over the board. 

Does chess make people smart, or are smarter people more likely to play chess? There is an argument to be made that people who take up chess become smarter due to the elements required to improve (learning how to study, discipline through practice, mentally handling loses etc.) and not anything to do with the actual game itself. This is true with most every game people stereo-typically associate intelligence with. Perhaps it is chess, but it may also be applied to Stratego, Monopoly, Scrabble or really most any strategy-based game for that matter.

I hurt myself again pretty bad.

It's not really that I'm thinking anything at all - not that I'm stupid - I get overloaded with anger and self loathing and need to make myself feel pain. I'm a weak person. Probably too weak for chess.

The day after a long night at the club I always feel like have a bad hangover. All fuzzy headed, lasts until midday

The first couple of tournaments I played in I was the same way. But the more you sweat in training the less you bleed in battle. In other words the key is TRAINING. Learn the openings several moves deep. And your brain will have to work less because you KNOW the moves. Good Luck