True, my longterm aim is the cheat without breaking the rules though
I'm going to become a GM, what pieces should I use?
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Aug 29, 2018
0
#4
What you need is a set of chess pieces made of cheese, then leave it out for about a week. It won't smell of "rich mahogany", but it will smell rich.
Aug 29, 2018
0
#5
SmyslovFan wrote:
What you need is a set of chess pieces made of cheese, then leave it out for about a week. It won't smell of "rich mahogany", but it will smell rich.
lolollol.
I recommend plastic Staunton (pronounced 'Stanton') pieces and a good book.
rbrandr wrote:
Strategically insert magnets into the other players king and rooks to prevent castling. Claim that you bought the set from a gypsy at the haunted carnival.
That gave me a storm drain of an idear'... strategically rig up da' pieces so you can move them magnetically without detection when your enemy touches said pieces into a losing position. Be sure and use that mohagany colone #9, wear a smoke'in vest, puff on a pipe to make big clouds to hide tha" under-tha-table-mechanism and grow a pollo playa'z mustachie thinGy.. 
Aug 29, 2018
0
#8
KingSullian wrote:
rbrandr wrote:
Strategically insert magnets into the other players king and rooks to prevent castling. Claim that you bought the set from a gypsy at the haunted carnival.
That gave me a storm drain of an idear'... strategically rig up da' pieces so you can move them magnetically without detection when your enemy touches said pieces into a losing position. Be sure and use that mohagany colone #9, wear a smoke'in vest, puff on a pipe to make big clouds to hide tha" under-tha-table-mechanism and grow a pollo playa'z mustachie thinGy..
Grow a pencil-thin mustache (the Boston Blackie kind), get a two-toned Ricky Ricardo jacket and an autographed picture of Andy Devine. It has nothing to do with chess, but it sure would be cool...
EscherehcsE wrote:
KingSullian wrote:
rbrandr wrote:
Strategically insert magnets into the other players king and rooks to prevent castling. Claim that you bought the set from a gypsy at the haunted carnival.
That gave me a storm drain of an idear'... strategically rig up da' pieces so you can move them magnetically without detection when your enemy touches said pieces into a losing position. Be sure and use that mohagany colone #9, wear a smoke'in vest, puff on a pipe to make big clouds to hide tha" under-tha-table-mechanism and grow a pollo playa'z mustachie thinGy..
Grow a pencil-thin mustache (the Boston Blackie kind), get a two-toned Ricky Ricardo jacket and an autographed picture of Andy Devine. It has nothing to do with chess, but it sure would be cool...
LOL Ya, make our gud' buddy lOOk debonair like..
Just when I thought there was hope for mankind.
Chess masters are known to employ strange methods to win their games. Ruy Lopez, the famous 16th-century Spanish priest and chess player, once advised, “Sit your opponent with the sun in his eyes.” Another player named Lucena once recommended, “Try to play after your opponent has eaten or drunk freely.”
This above is akin to cheating, but if it's ok for a priest then who am I to argue?
Dear chess ladies and chess gentlemen,
I, as many of my predictors before, have decided to begin the easy task of becoming a GM. I forecast that if I modestly increase my elo by 25 per year with 5 hours study and 2 hours sleep a day, I should be there in 60 years.
More pressingly though, I require a new chess-set to begin this endeavour. I'm looking for a set with similar looking pieces so as to confuse my opponents when trying to read the board. Ideally the pieces should be quite fragile to, so in a time struggle my opponent my break one and I can claim victory in this noble way.
I'm also looking for a board as well, preferablly smelling of rich mahogany to go with my many leather-bound books. It needs to have quite a potent glare, to the point where sunglasses (eg. mine) are required by players to look at it.
As you can see, I am prepared to to win by any means necessary and I hope the community can get behind my can-do attitude with recommendations or further ways to sabotage my opponents.
Yours in friendship (unless we play)
George