Lack Of Self Control

I start a 30 minute Rapid game- hoping to have a good battle and maybe win and get some points, after all my goal is so near; and I’ve been improving rather quickly. Nope. I do all my opening moves in a minute, blunder, and then resign after I’m down material. I quickly start a new game. Within the first few moves I’ve resigned again.

I can’t seem to control myself. I keep getting worse. And if I lose a game terribly, I’m basically setting myself for a giant streak of loses. I get frustrated and angry. I’m not normally like that in day to day life. Someone please give me some tips on how to control myself and play to the best of my ability.

That’s the problem I can’t seem to help some days

Try to take a break. And maybe play some bot game to. The idea with botgame is both that they are not running on a clock but also not vs players. And the idea is that it will take some pressure off that you might feel when playing in normal game. I to feel rage sometimes when I play. And this is only in multiplayer pvp. If i play singleplayer or pve I never got to the raging stage. I think it all comes down to the stress and preasure level. I dont know how to reduce this while playing pvp. If I play vs easier opponent it takes away some of the pressure and stress, but I want to compete and get better to. 

Thanks for the suggestions everyone. I definitely believe I’m overly competitive and determined to win everything. There were times I would run in a marathon and push my self until almost fainting just to win which probably isn’t worth it. I’ll try to take your suggestions.

I agree with you, playing a bot is relaxing and fun, and It improves your skills.

suggest puzzles & daily games:

they can train you to relax & enjoy searching for the best moves with virtually no clock pressure.    🙂

Yeah pride is something I’m still in the process of letting go. Wow Chess is so amazing, helps with even our qualities.

Can’t afford membership so my puzzles are limited unfortunately

I tried out daily for the first time on Wednesday

If you’re an adult improver, perhaps my blog can give you some insights.

https://www.chess.com/blog/foobarred1

Yeah speed chess definitely does not help

I don’t normally blunder but I guess it’s the stress of life sometimes causing me to play abnormally

Thanks for the blog, I will check it out although adult wouldn’t be the correct term 🙃

Sorry no offense but I don’t think your exactly qualified to help me. I mean your advice isn’t the best

You kind of missed the mental aspect of my post, it wasn’t really about pattern recognition.

I don’t think you understand

If you're spending 1 minute on your opening moves, you're playing 30 min chess wrong.

 

I also play too quickly sometimes, and I think I have similar problems to you. The way I have found works for me (and I guess this sounds a bit hippy) is to think about my next move, not with the intention to come up with a move, but with the intention to understand what's going on, and only when you're sure you know what's happening do you move.

 

If you're trying to get better at physically not moving instantly, practice! After move one, just force yourself to take 15 seconds! Who cares what your opponent thinks, this is a random online game, they're probably eating doritos in their underwear. Take it easy, and just force yourself to take your time until it comes naturally.

 

Maybe, as other posters recommended you also need to take a break - do whatever you need to do my guy, just don't keep doing what you're doing because it's obviously not making you happy. 

I think the basic thought process we should all be following is.....every time your opponent makes a move, simply ask yourself why are they making that move, do I need to do anything about it, but we are programmed to have tunnel vision, just concentrating on what we're doing, I've been guilty, but trying to drum this basic concept into me has helped me improve.

In longer time controls I have the opposite problem. I'll sit there and think for too long. 

Thanks guys. JamesClrkke you clearly don’t understand this post so I suggest not commenting. People at the 600 level don’t have to resign because their opponent is going to make a similar blunder just now regeardless and anything can happen.