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My wife hates chess

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gumpty
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Jul 16, 2010
0
#41

Divorce her, and decide who gets the house by playing 10 games of blitz (3-0)...she will soon be wishing SHE had spent all her time on chess.com

DPenn
DPenn
Jul 16, 2010
0
#42
Adamperfection wrote:
DPenn wrote:
woodshover wrote:
Adamperfection wrote:
woodshover wrote:

Maybe couples ought to have the sense to make sure they have something in common before they get married.

You don't say?

 If it's so obvious, how come this issue comes up so often?

 In my case I was 16 when I met him and being raised in a fundamentalist Christian home I was taught sex before marriage was a sin.  He was my best friend and I suppose we could have stayed friends had we not gotten married and had I not expected a satisfying sex life.

Why do/did you let your parents force their views unto you? Think for yourself. I am going to a Catholic school right now and it is anything but holy. I'm almost sure some scripture in the bible says that sex is for the weak, and you should only get married if you are too weak to stay celibate(it's in the new testament can't remember where).

Parents usually do have a tendency to force their views on children.  Children really don't have a choice on that. Thanks for your wise and learned advice though lol  

Tricklev
Tricklev
Jul 17, 2010
0
#43

Maybe she'd prefer playing with black?



That's the only chess related joke I could think of.

karplak3
karplak3
Jul 17, 2010
0
#44

lol, i never thought of it like that, but for once, just for "spite" i'd make sure the king had a headache.

TheOldReb
NM TheOldReb
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Jul 17, 2010
0
#45

My first marriage ended in divorce and chess was part of the reason why , now I am married a second time and my wife is crazier about chess than me and we are living " happily ever after " ! 

I remember once my first wife complaining about all the chess sets I had as she noted that " you can only play with one at the time, why so many ? "  ( actually, even this isnt true since I have given exhibitions )  My response was " and how many pairs of shoes can you wear at the time ? "  This retort didnt go over well but it certainly shut her up temporarily. 

henri5
henri5
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Jul 17, 2010
0
#46
Adamperfection wrote:
DPenn wrote:
woodshover wrote:
Adamperfection wrote:
woodshover wrote:

Maybe couples ought to have the sense to make sure they have something in common before they get married.

You don't say?

 If it's so obvious, how come this issue comes up so often?

 In my case I was 16 when I met him and being raised in a fundamentalist Christian home I was taught sex before marriage was a sin.  He was my best friend and I suppose we could have stayed friends had we not gotten married and had I not expected a satisfying sex life.

Why do/did you let your parents force their views unto you? Think for yourself. I am going to a Catholic school right now and it is anything but holy. I'm almost sure some scripture in the bible says that sex is for the weak, and you should only get married if you are too weak to stay celibate(it's in the new testament can't remember where).

That was in Saint Paul Epistles. But he clearly meant to abstain if you didn't get married...

Chess is better than other hobbies: it is totally useless, costs almost nothing, can be played in any weather, doesn't require much space, can lead to insanity and can suck up all of one's time. Marriage is the opposite: absolutely necessary for procreation, VERY expensive, can only be played occasionally, and requires a lot of space, and requires sharp survival instincts, but it can also suck up all of one's time - especially with a couple of small kids...Tongue out

Hey I have been playing chess for over 50 years and been married for 45, so I have a lot of experience (but I still leave my Queen hanging on the chess board and in real life....)

soach
soach
Jul 17, 2010
0
#47
woodshover wrote:

Maybe couples ought to have the sense to make sure they have something in common before they get married.

 Bad idea! It might be fun for a while but if you have an ounce of competive spirit in you, you'll be fighting before two years are out and if you make seven years, you will be totally insane.

soach
soach
Jul 17, 2010
0
#48

Bravo! Henri5!

I have been married to my one and only for 37 years but I can tell you this:

"Marriage is the opposite: ... VERY expensive, can only be played occasionally, and requires a lot of space, and requires sharp survival instincts, but it can also suck up all of one's time - especially with a couple of small kids..." is a true statement.

My wife is almost the total opposite of me. She loves NASCAR, I love Poker. She loves golf, I love chess. I am extrovert social animal, she is totally introvert. I love to ski, she gets depressed by Winter. I like college football, she likes Pro football. I love the Western US, she loves the Eastern US. I like Alaska especially in the Winter when it is well below zero, she has to be in Delaware! I am a geek she is, well, computer illiterate. (This has lead to some interesting arguments about why the computer I gave her doesn't work!)

But I love her and she tolerates me by making me breakfast in the mornings and supper at night.Foot in mouth

sef_muqaj
sef_muqaj
Jul 17, 2010
0
#49
Flamma_Aquila wrote:

She doesn't hate chess. She hates that you have fun without her.

Here's what you do. Tell her you are quitting chess, cold turkey, then pick up some more "normal" hobbies.

Then start going to play golf with your buddies all weekend, every weekend. Spend hundreds of dollars on lessons, new clubs, and greens fees. Come home drunk and exhausted every weekend.

Soon, she'll be begging you to go back to chess.

Or, try this tack...

Tell her that you've decided to spend more time with her and her interests. Then, follow her everywhere. When she goes to the mall with the girls, be there. When she goes to get her hair or nails done, be there. Smother her.

She'll be begging you to go back to chess.

ha ha ha. man these advices are very funny and interesting!

goldendog
goldendog
Jul 17, 2010
0
#50
Tricklev wrote:

Maybe she'd prefer playing with black?



That's the only chess related joke I could think of.

Find ways that it would be fun for her to play with your clock. That's right, I said clock.

DPenn
DPenn
Jul 17, 2010
0
#51
LisaV wrote:
EnterTheDragon wrote:

Well for God's Sakes Man! you're on vacation with the family or wife in NC!  You shouldn't be online playing chess when you're on vacay with the wife or family(unless the wife is asleep and you sneak on for a few blitz games sacrificing your own sleep- that's ok)

Get your Chess Bug under control man!... it's an awesome game/hobby/life-long pursuit so long as you can control it and not the other way around.

I believe the OP is posting tongue-in-cheek, and perhaps only vaguely seriously.  I'll refer you to my earlier post #29 for the context he is writing in.

Knowing the Outer Banks, I think he's having a bit of a laugh at himself for playing chess at more than just a vacation spot.

Could be wrong.  Don't think so.

-------------------------

On a side note, I'm also chuckling over all the internet marriage advice, as if we're all marriage counselors who know each other.  lol

My advice...stay single.  :)

 Good advice Lisa!  I would opt for a male harem but but I think I might have better luck getting a pet unicorn.

ivandh
ivandh
Jul 17, 2010
0
#52
goldendog wrote:
Tricklev wrote:

Maybe she'd prefer playing with black?



That's the only chess related joke I could think of.

Find ways that it would be fun for her to play with your clock. That's right, I said clock.

Exploring various positions is a great way to improve.

Flamma_Aquila
Flamma_Aquila
Jul 17, 2010
0
#53
DPenn wrote:
LisaV wrote:
EnterTheDragon wrote:

Well for God's Sakes Man! you're on vacation with the family or wife in NC!  You shouldn't be online playing chess when you're on vacay with the wife or family(unless the wife is asleep and you sneak on for a few blitz games sacrificing your own sleep- that's ok)

Get your Chess Bug under control man!... it's an awesome game/hobby/life-long pursuit so long as you can control it and not the other way around.

I believe the OP is posting tongue-in-cheek, and perhaps only vaguely seriously.  I'll refer you to my earlier post #29 for the context he is writing in.

Knowing the Outer Banks, I think he's having a bit of a laugh at himself for playing chess at more than just a vacation spot.

Could be wrong.  Don't think so.

-------------------------

On a side note, I'm also chuckling over all the internet marriage advice, as if we're all marriage counselors who know each other.  lol

My advice...stay single.  :)

 Good advice Lisa!  I would opt for a male harem but but I think I might have better luck getting a pet unicorn.

Why would a male harem be hard (pardon the pun)?

I used to have single female friends that would gripe about how long it had been since they got some. I would just laugh. I mean, go to any bar, grocery store, or pretty much anywhere else. Find a guy you think is hot. Go up to him and say, "Hey, no b.s., no names, let's go to your place and knock one out." Done. That easy.

For women, it is a 100% proposition. I don't care how ugly you are. The only thing that will affect is how long you have to hang around the bar before someone gets drunk enough.

And as for the harem, I'm sure there are lots of guys who would be ok with that. Just outfit a room in your house with a flatscreen, an xbox, lots of beer. Then just invite guys over, and take your pick.

Of course, like a unicorn, often the horn will be a disappointment, but hey, plenty more where that came from no?

DPenn
DPenn
Jul 17, 2010
0
#54

LOL @ Flamma...flatscreen, xbox and beer eh?  I wouldn't ever get any attention and they would expect me to do their laundry and fix them sandwiches.

Crazychessplaya
Crazychessplaya
Jul 17, 2010
0
#55

"You are not alone" - my wife just told me to post this comment. Hmmm.

soach
soach
Jul 17, 2010
0
#56

詩曰：「妻子好合，如鼓瑟琴；兄弟既翕，和樂且耽；宜爾室家；樂爾妻帑。」

 

It is said in the Book of Poetry, "Happy union with wife and children is like the music of lutes and harps. When there is concord among brethren, the harmony is delightful and enduring. Thus may you regulate your family, and enjoy the pleasure of your wife and children."

Flamma_Aquila
Flamma_Aquila
Jul 17, 2010
0
#57
DPenn wrote:

LOL @ Flamma...flatscreen, xbox and beer eh?  I wouldn't ever get any attention and they would expect me to do their laundry and fix them sandwiches.

A no clothes rule would solve the laundry problem, and as for the sandwiches, I suggest a crushed viagra and mayo spread. Tongue out

flirtyking
flirtyking
Jul 17, 2010
0
#58

My ole lady whines to, I think they just dont like attention being paid to anything but them.

Flamma_Aquila
Flamma_Aquila
Jul 17, 2010
0
#59
flirtyking wrote:

My ole lady whines to, I think they just dont like attention being paid to anything but them.

Yeah, makes you miss the days when you could beat em, as long as the stick was thinner than your thumb. Wink

DPenn
DPenn
Jul 17, 2010
0
#60

 I don't know why your women don't appreciate you.  You all are so romantic and endearing.  Tongue out