Outdated Chess Quotes

In this thread, post quotes about/relevant to chess that are funny now but were dead serious when they were made.

I have a couple out of a 1973 book about the Fischer/Spassky match.

     "... a group of Americans in New York was using a computer in New York to help Fischer... The announcement brought hysterical laughter from the chess specialists gathered in Reykjavik, including the referre, [Lothar] Schmid. Even the Russians smiled at the 'news' from Moscow.
     'That's nonsense,' said Schmid.
     'Asinine. Pure fantasy,' said Jack Collins, a former New York State champion.
     'Ridiculous,' commented Larry Evans...
     'Computers,' said Dr. [Max] Euwe, 'play average chess--very bad.'"

     "Grandmaster--the highest ranking in chess... there are about 90 grandmasters in the entire world." 

Luke : First : the title of this forum " outdated " means that it is no longer in general use ; that has nothing to do with funny or serious, it is just a quote at that time.

So, Euwe was absolutely right when he said this, based on facts at that time, and, as a mathematician and grandmaster he knew what he said !

When we forget the words funny and serious, we can make this a nice forum, with the year of quote : e.g. in the year 1061 the Archbishop of Florence called chess ' shameful, senseless and disgusting ' ; in 1291, the Archbishop of Canterbury said ' this heinous vice had to be banished ' .

During the Inquisition, Savonarola threatened the inhabitants of Florence with eternal damnation if they were caught playing...

Well, this is old stuff, let's be glad such texts don't exist anymore, but we all can look for more ( modern, up-to-date ) quotes, I will try to find more !

"That's why the pawn may move no more than one square at any time."

-author unknown

"You're dreaming again lads. There will never be any other way to notate chess moves other than descriptive notation or my name is Rumplestiltskin."

-author unknown

"Bobby Fischer is the current world champion."

- lots of ppl in 1972

Anything having to do with adjourned games

In the post WWll period the capital of the chess world was all about what's  "the move from Moscow."  Nowadays it's seeming to be "the move from suds city, St. Louis."

Would the author's name be Rumplestiltskin by any chance?

I always thought it was, but couldn't find any reliable source to confirm it yet.

The privilleged classes, meaning the clergy themselves as well as aristocracy, were the predominant groups that used to play chess back then. The statements you have cited were directed at common folk, who were supposed to work rather than play. A chess-playing peasant was expected to contribute less to the sustaining of the privilleged classes above him, thus understandably efforts were made to scare him away from the game.