True story that I heard at a tournament many decades ago...we were discussing how, after a long hard game, quite often our eyes would be red & one of my friends told of a woman who asked him, "why are your eyes red? You're not doing anything!"
Anyone who talks about something they don't know about, as if they know about it, makes themselves look silly. Did that make any sense? lol
"Isn't chess racist since the white guy always moves first?"
There used to be Green and Blue pieces in chess. But then all the Martains, and Smurfs complained we were stereotyping them. And you know how that goes...
I have a pink chess set :D I really do!!! Pink and white pieces. The board is pink and white.
As a member of the outermost digit of the human hand, i find your use of a "Pinky chess set" highly offensive. I strongly suggest you turn over your politically incorrect set to the proper liberal authorities immediatly, and begin praying for your soul's forgiveness.
Please direct your concerns to US Chess Federation Sales. trollololololol...
i ask who's turn it is all the time...but it is otb chess and they do not use clocks.
"So everytime I capture a piece I have to sing 'I'm a little Teapot'?{
"So everytime I capture a piece I have to sing 'I'm a little Teapot'?{
Your profile pic is seriously starting to scare me, and if that thing started singing that song, oh my... lol
"Okay heres my game! I was black
Pe4 Pe5 Bc4 a6 Qh5!! Killer move! He forkd my pawns! And I couldn't find a way to defend both pawns... and I couldn't play g6 becuase Qxe5+ Qxh8 wins the rook. So I played d6 but he played Qxf7!! And now I can't stop Qxe8 next move. "
"So everytime I capture a piece I have to sing 'I'm a little Teapot'?{
Your profile pic is seriously starting to scare me, and if that thing started singing that song, oh my... lol
Lol, I'm, I mean Furbies are harmless and if you smoke something it will appear to sing!
Always distracted by someone asking to polish my bishop.
What do they call those guys who play chess on TV? Graham Crackers?
Yours too. What I said to kleiner. lol
"When you have a lone king and he is not checkmated within 16 moves it is stalemate."
I've heard it's actually 13 moves, by prison rules.
"When you have a lone king and he is not checkmated within 16 moves it is stalemate."
I've heard it's actually 13 moves, by prison rules.
Common beginer misconception.
The real rule is 13 moves with a material difference of strictly less than 5.
"BAZINGA!!!"
"Excuse me ...?"
"I said Bazinga. Get your King to safety!"
Once, I was playing a live chess game, and my non-chess playing sister was being really loud.
So I said to her, "Can you be a little more quiet. I'm trying to calculate something?"
She replied, " How do you calculate a chess move?"
"The pawns are the King and Queen's kids?"
Once, I was playing a live chess game, and my non-chess playing sister was being really loud.
So I said to her, "Can you be a little more quiet. I'm trying to calculate something?"
She replied, " How do you calculate a chess move?"
I am trying to make sense of your profile pic... lol
Once, I was playing a live chess game, and my non-chess playing sister was being really loud.
So I said to her, "Can you be a little more quiet. I'm trying to calculate something?"
She replied, " How do you calculate a chess move?"
I am trying to make sense of your profile pic... lol
haha!! 
"The pawns are the King and Queen's kids?"
I've also heard, "If the king and queen are next to each other long enough, do I get an extra pawn?"
If the white pony and the black pony mate, do you get a zebra?
Whose turn is it?
HAHAHAHA, yes!!!