What it's really like being a female chess player.

I don't see that? Someone displaying a picture of themselves doesn't tell me anything about how they want to interact or if they ever feel like interacting beyond playing a game of chess, reading the forums, articles, solving problems, etc.

What you obviously can't explain is how your strawman and red herring claim applies to my statement. But that's not surprising, elubas;)

Well, posts 1812 and 1813, one by me, one by binary, would address your question pretty well.

Basically, you do things for a reason. You can't say one thing and do another, and expect people to believe you. If you don't want to interact with people on a chess website, you will shy away from anything that would expose you. How a person like that goes onto put in extra effort just to get a picture up, I don't understand, and I'll question it. I'm not saying I can know 100%, but I'm not going to take the complaints of a (seemingly) dishonest person nearly as seriously as complaints from an honest person, who actually acts in a way consistent with what they say.

Lol, how is that not surprising? If anything, I explain things too much, as you'd know, it fills up my posts, which people don't like.

Ok, well now that you finally clarified what your problem was, sure, I'll tell you the strawman that you apparently did not notice.

You talked about the "rights" of goofballs -- but this isn't about rights at all. This isn't about whether or not a person should sexually harass a person -- they shouldn't. That should be obvious, hence the strawman, where you tear apart an argument that nobody is making. You're right, but it's not saying much. There is still a lot to be said about how to conduct yourself, and how to send messages. You do want to be conscious of how you send messages, so that you can communicate with your friends, family, co-workers, and, the public, much better.

Well people have different moods, reasons, thoughts about what they do that I'm quite sure you are not privy to enough information to assume anything about, especially just posting a selfie. But one things for sure, you can act like you know

Not about their character.

Anyway, it only took the first sentence of the OP before I was already not taking it seriously. Don't know what we're talking about now, hopefully not about that.

This seems like kind of a dishonest comment, though. Because I would think you rely on messages all the time. Even if a stranger asked you for a certain amount of help, you would look for signs to see whether or not they're a sincere, honest person, or if they're just messing with you, right? If they say they need money, but you see a nice watch on them, you might say, gee, you say that you need money, but you don't act like it, because you have such a nice watch.

Messages are a part of life that we all use. They're not 100% indicators, but some are pretty obvious, and we all have experienced obvious indicators before. You very much send messages with your behavior, and the internet is no exception. I don't see why it's only when it comes to the internet when you don't believe in messages anymore.

No, I forgot about the OP. I was speaking generally:)

And as a bit of a supplement to my "poor stranger" example:

The truth is, maybe that watch he (or she) had before, maybe it was a gift, etc, sure. But it's not crazy that a person might get the idea that you're lying to them, in other words, you can't blame a person for being suspicious at first, even if they're wrong. You're probably better off not wearing the watch so that you don't send the wrong message. You might say that sucks, but these people who are taking in messages are just doing the best they can to understand their environment, and you can help them out by sending them the right messages.

It's obviously a compromise. But it's not one created by hate or something. In fact it tends to be pretty useful. When people are happy with each other, they try to use a method of communication that really shows that, so that the other person knows. It would be a lot harder for society to function if happy people constantly gave messages that made it look like they were sad, and vice versa.

I kind of figured that you didn't know what I was talking about. I was speaking about how people assume so much out of a selfie. Like all of the sudden they get so arrogant about themselves that they go from making judgements to themselves all the way to contacting that person as if an invitation was mailed to them. The goofballs go so far as to harrass a person. 

I mean to be fair, trysts, I understand your concern, I think, anyway. You don't want people to feel like, they can't do this or that just because of how society reacts to it. I agree with that, and I often complain about that myself. If I have a sincere reason for liking a certain thing, and people assume I'm not sincere, that kind of sucks. It's like I'm being punished for what other people did.

So I very much feel for that. But at the same time, it's impossible not to live without guesses and assumptions. That even pisses me off sometimes. But it would just be dishonest on my part to act like 100% knowledge is the only way to get anything done. It's just not how things work. So, when a message is really obvious, sometimes you have to make use of it, even if there is a small chance you might be wrong about it.

Either way, one can cross the line. You can judge based on something that's almost irrelevant, too. So you need to be careful. But there are dead giveaways out there, and you can avoid them by changing how you present yourself. It's just the honest, rather than idealistic or wishful, way of looking at things.

I don't get much of a message about a person from a selfie. A painting, yes. A snapshot? Not enough information to form any opinion on the person. One can be too easily deceived.

No, I completely understand that. When I said that females are communicating by posting a selfie... well, it's like entering into a social area. A place meant to be social. If you entered into that, people will expect you to be social, and if you don't like it, you're free to leave.

So people who say "hi" to you will be more social with you, at least at first. You made them feel more comfortable by giving info in your profile, and posting a pic.

But it's a matter of degree. I would completely agree that they shouldn't just start making sexual comments out of the blue. But I would hope we also agree that "hi how are you?" is not a sexual comment... even if a man is saying it to a woman. Some extremists would say that, though. I'm more in the middle. I think some comments are harmless, and some clearly aren't, some comments are sick indeed.

Well, we disagree here, then. Again, it's not about the content of the selfie, it's the lack of privacy of the selfie. A private person is (very) likely not going to post something that identifies them like that.

On the other hand, if a person posts a selfie on facebook, you probably know next to nothing about them. They could be social or not very social, as it's just common in general for selfies to be posted there -- that's what the site is for, stuff like that. But when you take an intellectual game like chess and post a selfie, you are socializing it, you're going out of your way to do so. That's perfectly fine, I just think that if you do that, you should admit it.

When you enter into the social arena you are under no obligation to stay there. If I'm walking downtown and I say hello to a man passing by, that may be all the socializing I wish to do. And certainly, if someone posts a picture of themselves it is not necessarily a "message" or invitation to socialize. There is just not enough information to form those opinions.  

No no no. A person's privacy should be assumed and respected no matter if they post a selfie or not. 

"And certainly, if someone posts a picture of themselves it is not necessarily a "message" or invitation to socialize. There is just not enough information to form those opinions."

I think it's a pretty good amount of information, actually. How about you? Could you even imagine posting a pic of yourself? Would you find anything to gain from that? You probably don't have a desire to get more personal with people, to share a part of your life with people. But you're saying that maybe your mood will suddenly change and you'll just want to post a pic? It's that simple? You'll have the same old attitudes as before, but suddenly just want to post a pic. That's hard for me to believe.

The thing about you, trysts, is that you have no desire to meet men, and I actually believe you. You actually act like it, very consistently. You act as you say you do.

Well what are you considering privacy, exactly? Would you consider a note saying "hi" an invasion of privacy? Even if someone says hi on my note wall here, I most certainly would not consider it to be that. So it depends on how extreme you're talking.

But yeah, again, we sometimes have to function on messages sent, especially obvious ones.

No no no no no. You're not making any sense here. You've lost me completely