PLAY WITH PATIENCE.....
that is the biggest part of my game that I need to control....
I try to go for the checkmate when I should be more patient and look for the best move in that situation...
I was given that advice and it works for me as I have been improving as of late... now I play using the points... and if the checkmate is there, then I analyze how and if it can be stopped, and if it's clear then I go... as opposed to wildly attacking with the queen as I used to do....
I think you should start with playing correspondence chess or untimed games. Give yourself all the time you need to think... and use it... I could make other suggestions, but I think it starts there.
You've tried a steady diet of 20 minute games... and you have the evidence of how well it works: no improvement. I doubt you are gaining much from reviewing these games because there's not much to review -- in the two or three that I reviewed, it looked to me like you missed moves that are you perfectly capable of finding and which you do find 95% of the time. A 95% non-blunder rate means you make a game losing blunder every 20 moves... that will keep your rating in the low-thousands, even if you play decent chess the other 19 moves.
Slow down, play CC and don't play too many games! Make sure in each game you are playing the best move possible that you can find. Don't rush.
Focus each and every move on finding your best move and test every move you make -- try to make your move fail. Decide upon your opponent's best response to your move -- only after you have decided on that should you make a move. You do not have time to do this properly in 20 minute chess! You train vision and calculation and intuition in slow chess, even more so by slowly and deeply reviewing and analyzing your best chess -- you can't play your best chess at 20 minute time control... if you haven't developed vision calculation and intuition then playing fast time controls will not help you develop them!
Try this training discipline: Play some cc games. In the notes to the game, decide what your opponent's BEST move in response to your move is, write it down and save it as a note BEFORE you make your move! After he moves, examine his move and decide whether his move was better or worse than the move you thought he should make. (You don't have to spend forever on this, just a quick look) Make a mark + when his move is better than yours, a - when you think yours was better =, when you got it right.
Save these notes and you will really have something to review after your game. You will have record of what you missed and how you got surprised. I'm no master but I'll be happy to go over games that you have played and noted this way.
I can make other training recommendations for you -- but this one will take you a long way if you give it time.