Why do I lose so much?

well... i'm hoping someone can provide me with some honest insight. please be gentle.

chess makes me feel so dumb. i lose all the time, even when i've got a material advantage and some reasonably good position. i joined this website not too long ago to try and improve my game (and knowledge) yet i still seem to defeat myself time and time again. i could blame any number of faults but i don't feel that i'm getting to the heart of the matter.

i've been reading up to try and learn the game, but it's so much to absorb i just don't know if maybe i'll get it in time or what. i think i just don't understand and recognize simple patterns and ideas. 

so, lay it on me, chess.com community. am i not as bright as i think i am or what? as much as i play here i never seem to advance or learn anything.

what can a noob like myself focus on to efficiently learn and progress?

I'd suggest playing some correspondence games rather than live ones so you can take your time to figure out good moves rather than just guessing under time pressure as I imagine might often be the case. If you take the time to really look at each position you can gradually get a better idea of what works and what doesn't.

Well, first of all it has nothing to do with intelligence, so I wouldn't worry too much about being dumb or smart just because you win or lose a few chess games.  Although I know the frustration can be bad.

Secondly you may just be going through a rough patch... having a sort of losing streak.  If you're losing even after getting up in material then it may just be a lack of focus.  Some days we play better than others.  Although, if this continues over a few weeks then you definitely have some things to work on :)

I looked at some of your games.  You play better than your rating IMO, but in a few of them, like you said, you'd suddenly self destruct.  One bit of advice I would say relax a bit more in the opening and just focus on getting your pieces out.  There's no need to immediately attack so long as you're making sure to develop.  Along with this your openings seem too aggressive.  Play e4 or d4 and in response to e4, e5 and d4, d5.  On other white moves play e5 or d5.  And try to keep a pawn in the center.  If you plan to castle kingside don't you dare touch those three pawns, your pawn shield!  Clean classic chess.

You can still be agressive and pressure your opponent, just be sure the opening phase is all about development (pawn moves aren't developing moves), the center and king safety.  After move 10 feel free to cut loose.  Only do so before hand if your opponent falls far behind in development (or of course hangs a piece and lets you have it for free).  You play the first few moves pretty well, but then the last half of your openings you seem to get distracted and want to attack when you should be all about the center, development (only 1 or 2 pawn moves!), and king safety.

In the middle game, again I think you play better than your rating, but like you noted in some games you suddenly self destruct.  I think this may be simply a bad day/week whatever.  If this continues though, just be sure to consistently check each move what your opponent's last move attacked or threatened.  Also make sure the move you plan to make is to a safe square.  You seem to be pretty good (again better than I'd expect) at this in the beginning of your games, but later due to fatigue or whatever it seems to drop off.

It comes with practice is all I can say.  I played as good as or worse than you when I was beginning, it can seem like you're not making any improvement for a while and then suddenly you figure something out or blunder checking becomes more routine and your rating goes up.

In any case, don't let a losing streak get you down.  It happens to all of us, and doesn't have much to do with your aptitude for chess and even less to do with your intelligence in general.

wow... thanks, folks. i honestly didn't know what to think. 

i actually just got "the complete book of chess strategy" by jeremy silman 2 days ago. heehee i didn't want to say anything about it, but dammit i want to learn and improve! actually it seems to be a pretty good book and i'm happy with it.

so, orangehonda, i have been trying to work on my openings (as you advise) but of course i still have much to learn. i'm actually really surprised that you took time to look at my games and help me out. thank you very much! i appreciate it. some people have said some things to me because of my name (which is a joke) and i'm glad to see that i can honestly connect with people on here instead of being portrayed as a weirdo.

anyway... yessir, i'll definitely consider all of this. also i'm working on reading this book which i'm going to have to take notes on. it'll be a gradual learning process, i'm sure, but i think this is probably like riding a bike and just needs some work. 

well i think i had more to say but i can't think about more than playing and improving at the moment. i'm also thinking playing late at night while drinking wine might contribute to my situation.... heehee. oh but seriously.... i must meditate on this

Yeah, what is it with screen names?  People seem to think I own a honda... or at least my car is orange.  Or maybe I'm into cars?

No, none of those things are true   I'm more like LegoPirateSenior.  I picked a random name, and found a picture to match.

PS, Silman is a good author, and you can certainly grow with his books (e.g. re-read a year or two later).

Off topic, but I must congratulate you on correctly typing "lose" instead of "loose". That is a very rare thing around here nowadays.

one thing i have come across recently is people who bring their queens out super early. i don't know exactly what to do about this besides try and gain a position to attack the queen... but it's ridiculous. i try to play conservatively but it never works

Just develop naturally, you don't have to "punish" your opponent as soon as he does something "wrong" , if there's no direct win, just play natural moves and it will come back on him eventually.  If you try too hard to punish a bad move you can end up pulling yourself out of position.

Don't get all smart with me just because you're a NM

don't mind me, that was just a poorly crafted pun

come on, you're a NM, you should be smart enough to figure out that little pun.

i would advise you to check out some good games in books and try to play them,taking your time to understand why each move is played,with a friend or chess expert if possible.if you can find some chess friends  near you and play with them regularly asking them questions from the books,this would really help you much since learning as you play games is good.Chess clubs are also good.incase there are there,you would join one first to learn diffrent game lines and strategies and after learning,you can play the teacher or person in question as he or she shows you your weakness.As you do this,your game will greatly increase.Master one game line and tactic behind each game line before going to another..

Wish you the best as you become a great future chess player.!!!

I was joking of course.  I don't know whether you got the joke or not because as you duly noted, you won the argument that you might be a perfect idiot in addition to a NM.

We are breathlessly waiting on a reply from birdboy!

Yes, it was hard, and my dumb sub-2000 brain is finding it hard to comprehend the massive load of ideas it is being bombarded with.

 Bahaha.

There's this quote from a book I have: Being A Happy Teenager by Andrew Matthews:

"Any progress consists of ups and downs. Watch a tree grow. It grows some leaves and along comes a storm and blows some away. It grows more leaves and alongs comes a storm and blows some away. Watch the stock markets or the tides at a beach. There are ups and downs. You'll have ups and downs. But keep up your effort and you'll get to where you are going. Quitters don't understand this."

Back to topic:  Dont fret too much bro, follow orange honda's advice, your problems are mainly in the opening, develop with every move, only move pawns that open up bishops or that attack the center, attack the center not his pieces, dont move a piece twice unless it forces him to do the same and try and gain a "tempo" wherever possible...eg. attack his predeveloped queen by developing your knight. 

Also, dont feel bad or dumb because you keep losing, i have the nothing but respect for any chess player, especially one who is willing to soldier on like you. (especially after watching that loss to that 500er....man what a zinger of a game!)

There's different kinds of intelligence. Chess specific intelligence is chess specific. Then, there are other things like visual-spatial intelligence that are helpful to both chess and non-chess related things. That's what I gather. Then there's intelligence that isn't related to chess at all (how to win at Spades, for example).

Interesting.

http://www.chess.com/livechess/game.html?id=56742431

i hope that link works...  i haven't posted a game link so i dunno if it'll work. anyways... yessir, this guy had a rather low rating, which is partially why i joined his game. alas, he brought his queen out pretty quickly and i didn't want to let him just walk all over me. the game i played just before this one also had an early queen attack if i remember correctly.

regardless, i thought i was doing alright for a minute until i found myself in checkmate. i have been trying a couple different openings but i still am missing something. i want to thank everyone for your ambivalence and help. it's comforting to know that there aren't a bunch of snooty intellectuals looking down on me for whatever reason. i only frequent one internet forum besides this one and i really have a lot of problems with many things there. anyway...

now i am going to play another game! hopefully i'll have an epiphany and make some real progress. tomorrow i shall take some serious notes from the book i got. hooray

You need to get ur army out better before you send in your troops. And don't play your queen out so early.

Remember opening fundamentals

1.) Control the center ( 1-2 pawns in the middle)

2.) Develop your pieces (can't attack or defend well without them being out and ready)

3.) Castle early and often (king safety must be assured)

Extra point, don't move your queen out early, because she is your most valuable piece and most vulnerable one too in the early stage of the game.