#19
If you lose a game, that means you made a mistake and your opponent exploited it. So the issue is not your opponent, it is you and your mistake.
"At the same time I also feel that when I start a game, I already feel a minor piece down, like I started without one of my knights."
++ This seems irrational. You start with the same 16 men. Maybe you adopted a careless attitude that makes you blunder a piece sooner.
Of course I am making mistakes. But the question is, why are the 600-rated players more capable of exploiting my mistakes than before? This is definitely an environment factor. It's easy to limit the scope of the loss to what is happening on the board in front of you but I feel that it can be something bigger.
Also, regarding the feeling of starting with one piece less, I know it's irrational. That not the point. I'm again interested in the "why". What causes me (and others) to feel this way. I'm no longer looking for a way out but taking this chance to figure out losing on a deeper level, if you know what I mean.
"The blunders are all there on the board, waiting to be made." - Tartakower