The only thing that you can do is to agree to start from a certain position. For example, you might agree that you will start from 1. e4 e5 2. Nf3 Bc6 3. Bb5 a6 which is one variant of the Ruy Lopez. There are lots of tournaments that start from a position like this and therefore have a theme. I believe you can also challenge someone from a position like this too. However, each player is free to make whatever moves they like once they start.
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Is there a way to issue a challenge (in either live or online) to play a specific opening?