be kind to yourself. you start off your post in a very positive way -- proud to be a very good chess player for 13 years and then berate your habit ! It's OK to love playing and studying chess.
Seems that you have a difficult time justifying why you spend a great deal of time with chess. Just think it's ok and proceed from there.
I am a very good chess player who's been playing for 13 years and I love chess. These days though, it seems chess has become an obsession for me. Throughout the day I'll be thinking about my desire to study chess a lot getting in the way of being passionate about other things in life, and I'll think about chess so much that it' a messy thing. I do have a life outside of chess, not as big as I want it to be yet though. I work part time 3 days a week, I go to the gym on average 3 times a week, I have a little bit of a social life, and work on goals like improving my reading, listening, and memory at home. I've tried playing chess less, 3 days a week for 3 hours but I still find myself thinking about it. I've tried taking a week break, still nothing. I've tried retraining myself to not think about chess a lot and to think about other things but I find that there's still a strong tendency for me to think about chess and that's what happens. All advice is appreciated.