:D 🦖

🦖

Slay.

1. “I didn’t lie when I said I’d catch you.”
I just didn’t mention it’d be with a bear trap.

2. They asked why I keep score in friendships.
I said, “How else would I know when to betray them?”

3. I gave my enemy a gift:
A puzzle box with all the pieces glued together — and a single one missing.

4. She said, “Treat me like a princess.”
So I locked her in a tower and let the dragons vote.

5. I whispered “you’re safe now” while duct-taping the last parachute to my back.

6. I sent a thank-you card to my ex.
Inside was a photo of me holding the last piece of their childhood Lego set.

7. I RSVP’d to my high school reunion.
I’m not attending — I just wanted to cause fear.

8. “I’m not a monster,” I said.
“Monsters have rules. I’m freelance.”

9. I once helped a blind man cross the street…
Right into a mime convention.

10. My therapist asked why I laugh at funerals.
I told him, “Because weddings are too hopeful.”

Bro what

OK

I stayed up until 2:36 AM to catch the new Slay Anya post. It was worth it.

Lmaoo ty 😭😭

my beautiful Dino ✨

🦖✨

Doci bacchi

Arey

kya hua

🦕

This is one of those posts where I would downvote it for spam, but since Slay Anya made it, it’s just such an iconic thread. I’m glad I got to be the first to see it.

Can i delete tis ? 😭