I am so damn evil

MANIPULUX: The Joke Book of Emotional Domination
Chapter 1: Gaslight and Giggle
"I didn’t lie. I just remembered creatively."
"She said I never listen. At least, I think that’s what she said."
"If they question your memory, question their sanity. Works every time."
"It’s not deception if I believe it by morning."
"Reality is a suggestion, and I’m very persuasive."
Chapter 2: Guilt Trip Getaways
"Booked a guilt trip for two. Spoiler: I only packed my own baggage."
"I made them cry, then asked why they’re always so emotional."
"Never apologize. Just act wounded until they do."
"They brought facts, I brought tears. Guess who won."
"I cry on cue. Oscars pending."
Chapter 3: Lovebombs and Landmines
"I gave them flowers after the explosion. I'm not heartless."
"One day I’m their dream. The next, their nightmare. Keeps it spicy."
"Love is like war. I prefer ambush tactics."
"Showers of affection, followed by droughts of silence—emotional weather forecasting."
"I told them we were twin flames. Then I burned it all down."
Chapter 4: The Ghost Protocol
"I vanished for three weeks. They said they missed me. I said, 'You're welcome.'"
"It’s not ghosting if you haunt their thoughts."
"I wasn’t ignoring them. I was training them."
"Left them on read, and spiritually unread."
"Reappeared like Wi-Fi in a blackout—just when they gave up."
Chapter 5: Passive Aggressive is Just Aggressive With Manners
"Oh no, I’m fine. Just remember who made me this way."
"Why confront when you can silently punish?"
"Left them a note that said 'Enjoy!' on the empty fridge shelf."
"I don’t raise my voice—I raise expectations, then quietly watch them fall."
"My sarcasm is eco-friendly: 100% recycled resentment."
Chapter 6: Romantic Manipulation with a Smile
"I told her I loved who she was becoming—then made sure I chose who that was."
"The sweetest words are best used to silence the deepest doubts."
"Romance is emotional warfare in soft lighting."
"I held her heart like a lighter holds fuel—warm until the spark."
"Every love letter is a contract with invisible ink."
Dr. Manipulux’s Romantic Sadist Tips:
Affection is currency. Give just enough to keep them hooked.
Withdraw love during their worst days. They'll beg to earn it.
Rewrite the past. Gaslight gently. Deny. Reframe. Smile.
Disappear strategically. Return like nothing happened.
Never raise your voice. Let the silence echo.
Mirror their dreams until they mistake your mask for their soulmate.
Featured Poem: Whispers in the Cage
I loved you like a secret—
A lock without a key,
Wrapped tight in whispered lies
That only I could see.

Your heart was mine to fracture,
Slow cracks beneath the skin,
Each silent, aching moment
Where truth wore thin and thin.

I held your trust like poison,
A chalice drained in parts,
Pouring doubt with every kiss,
Sowing thorns within your heart.

You begged for light and mercy—
I smiled, turned off the flame.
For love, my dear, is bondage,
And I alone hold the chain.

Manipulux's Midnight Shower Thoughts:
"If they don’t love you at your worst, give them more worst."
"Tears make great mirrors. That’s how I know they still see me."
"I don’t dream of forgiveness. I fantasize about being missed."
"They say guilt fades with time. I make sure time never comes."
"Empathy is expensive. I prefer a return on investment."
"The silence after I leave? That’s just me echoing."
"Some people chase closure. I sell it by the ounce."
Chapter 7: Influencer Apocalypse
"Remember to like and subscribe before the radiation storm hits."
"Today’s haul: canned beans, expired meds, and 200k views."
"This fallout fit is sponsored by desperation and duct tape."
"Going viral in the wasteland? Don’t forget to tag the corpses."
"Running a giveaway: One Geiger counter, lightly used. Winner pays in teeth."
"I’m not looting—I’m curating vintage survival chic."
Fake Testimonials:
“I laughed until I realized I’ve dated three versions of this book.” — Unwilling Reader #438
“I gave it to my therapist. She quit.” — Traumatized But Loyal
“Manipulux stole my heart and sold it back to me in chapters.” — Still Crying, Thanks
“Ten pages in and I unlocked five suppressed memories.” — Numb, But Stylish
“It’s like emotional taxidermy—disturbingly lifelike.” — Stuffed and Shaken
Final Words from Dr. Manipulux
Love is control.
Humor is the mask.
Never let them see who's really laughing.

im trying to get a thingy for the forums

Hi, so damn evil, I’m Basix.

You are made of stars that died screaming billions of years ago.

They must’ve been some swexy stars.

If you're the last person alive, does your birthday even matter anymore?

#4 °-°

What is this thread?