if Apple makes a car will it have windows
I need jokes
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If a child refuses to nap, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.
I got carded at a liquor store, and my Blockbuster card accidentally fell out. The cashier said never mind.
I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I'll let you know...
I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.
I got carded at a liquor store, and my Blockbuster card accidentally fell out. The cashier said never mind.
I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I'll let you know...
Hahaha! Thanks, now I am ready to do chess. Here's a joke for the road:
Nurse: Doctor, there is an invisible patient in the waiting room
Doctor: Tell him I can't see him right now
Nurse: but doctor, he’s shrinking
Doctor: well he’s going to have to be a little patient
Doctor: well he’s going to have to be a little patient
Mar 14, 2022
0
#7
Marvin Gaye used to keep a sheep in my vineyard. He'd herd it through the grapevine."
Mar 14, 2022
0
#8
Last week I saw my psychiatrist. I told him, “Doc, I keep thinking I’m a dog.” He told me to get off his couch.
Mar 14, 2022
0
#11
They are both only dangerouse when you set them on fire and put them in your mouth
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh
A dying grandma tells her grandchild, "I want to leave you my farm. That includes the barn, livestock, the harvest, the tractor, and other equipment, the farmhouse and $24,548,750.45 in cash." The grandchild, absolutely floored and about to become rich says, "Oh grandma, you are SO generous! I didn't even know you had a farm. Where is it?" With her last breath, Grandma whispered, "Facebook... “
Mar 15, 2022
0
#16
an elderly couple ask for a divorce:
the clerk says, "why are you doing this NOW?"
they reply: "well, we have children you see & we didn't want to hurt their feelings... so we decided to wait until they died."
Did You Hear The Story About The Cheese That Saved The World? It was legend dairy.
Why do standup comedians perform poorly in Hawaii? Because the audience only responds in a low ha.
I got my COVID test today, it says 50. What does that mean? Also, my IQ test came back positive.
What do you call a sad gangster? An Emo-G.
What do you call two monkeys who share an Amazon account? Prime mates.
I asked 10 people what LGTBQ standed for… Couldn’t get a straight answer!
What did the Japanese cannibal eat for dinner? Raw men
Why does Sherlock Holmes love Mexican restaurants? They give him good case ideas.
Why do standup comedians perform poorly in Hawaii? Because the audience only responds in a low ha.
I got my COVID test today, it says 50. What does that mean? Also, my IQ test came back positive.
What do you call a sad gangster? An Emo-G.
What do you call two monkeys who share an Amazon account? Prime mates.
I asked 10 people what LGTBQ standed for… Couldn’t get a straight answer!
What did the Japanese cannibal eat for dinner? Raw men
Why does Sherlock Holmes love Mexican restaurants? They give him good case ideas.
What happens when a magician runs out of magic
It’s an Ian
I feel like I need some funny jokes, will you please comment some for me?