Limericks/Rhymes....keep it clean, if possible :)

Take him in and give him a good seeing to. 

I once stepped on a centipede,

because he profesed to be my enemy,

But when I looked at my boot,

I realized he was just a Schuette.

If I were a pawn,

The boys would all fawn.

For when I made queen,

they would all offer a ring.

There was a boy named Erik,

Rhyme zone says his name is so common,

But this great site he created,

and with me it could blossom.

kleelof, you are such a nut case, lol.

The principal will see you now. :)

I could do this all day,

with me it is always play.

Give me a topic,

And I'll be the best comic.

She said I'm a nut,

but I seem to be in a rut.

I've wasted all this time,

just to make a silly rhyme.

There once was a man called kleelof,

whose limericks made people peed-off,

the rhyming rules,

was merely for fools,

he said 'ill do what i want, you jerk-off'!

Thanks for understanding.

Kayak, this is the best thread you've ever started.

Keep it up and I'll actually admit to people we are chess friends.

kleelof, just as an FYI limericks are of the form AABBA, you're missing the last A :)

I think he might be missing more than one A and maybe a couple of Bs. lol. He does make me laugh though. 

This one is for centipede & kleelof..........

There once were two chaps in the forum

Who lost all sense of decorum

They both were my friend

They fought till the end

 Each one called the other a moron.  

Nooooooooo!  Don't do that. I was keeping it a secret. 

Haha great limerick kayak :D

I thought you might like that one. 

There once was a guy called pdela

He was short, he was red, what a feller,

He had one aim in life,

He must search for a wife,

To keep with the beer in the cellar.

For context, from this thread:

http://www.chess.com/forum/view/game-showcase/computer-hard-loses-in-11-moves