Petition to improve the way petitions are done on Chess.com (A parody)

I would like to start things off with a disclaimer. I do not intend to offend anyone here, nor do I want to call anyone specific out. While I'm not completely against the idea of petitions, I just believe that they are often done poorly, and can be done better. If you are a frequent petitioner, please don't take any personal offense to this post! I don't want to upset anyone...

As we have seen recently, there has been a huge influx of these "Petition" threads, petitioning various things and changes for this site. Although some of them do make sense, others are completely unreasonable, and there are also a few satire ones as well.

This is a very bad trend, almost as bad as the "Person Above You" trend, which plagues OTF. These petition threads often pop up throughout the forums, and they have become extremely tiring to see. It is very rare for a petition to actually be successful, and most people respond to petitions with negative responses. There have also been petitions requesting the ban of low ELO players from the forums, which is an absolutely horrid idea.

Some OPs may also block anyone who comments something that they don't agree with, making it far too easy for the OP to cherry-pick comments they agree with, while silencing the opposing side. As I've learned in my English II class, which is currently on the argumentative essay unit, if you are unable to address the opposing side, your argument consequently becomes weaker. Your argument will be much stronger if you are able to address any counterclaims, and then come up with a rebuttal on how they are wrong.

In fact, since I just mentioned counterclaims, it's about time that I address any counterclaims against this thread. Some people may argue that petitions are incredibly valuable to Chess.com, believing that they are helpful as a way to communicate requests and suggestions with the Chess.com staff. However, petitions are often done wrong and ineffectively, causing them to become incredibly weak. Remember when I mentioned the petition to ban all low ELO players from the forums? I will expand on that. There is a petition that calls for the ban of all <500 ELO players from the public forums. This is a terrible idea, because if a new player who genuinely wants to improve has a question, they can't simply use the Chess.com forums that are intended for that purpose. Like you know, the literal "For Beginners" category?

In conclusion, while petitions can be helpful when done correctly, they are often done ineffectively, and are seen as annoying. They often have wild requests that would be terrible for the site or members, which is the reason why people have very little respect for petitions.

All this typing, and my fingers still don't hurt. I could keep going for much longer, but I'd rather not. (Think of the poor mobile users!)

i aint reading dat essay ;-;

As long as a petition petitions it's a petition

Belongs on site feedback?

As to the point about new players being unable to access for beginners, I think vvs (who I assume is who this refers to) said he wanted OTF specifically to be inaccessible to them, and he said for beginners was useful and they should be allowed there

I don't like this, so I'm starting a petition to remove this petition against petitions

I am petition.