Irregular opening , and a mess too. but fun. :D
Please tell me this was bullet. And you were both drunk.
I have to agree that this was most likely to be a bullet game.
Yes, each of us had 5 minutes
I play better than that in bullet (without having played it extensively)...
5 min is blitz. How much time did you really use ? (because if you play in blitz as fast as bullet, you're kind of missing the point)
Sounds like a reasonable use of your time, being given there could have been an endgame.
What can I say...? Practice, don't play the same piece twice in the opening without necessity, don't play pawn moves that leave holes, etc.