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Support for Suicidal Individuals on Social & Digital Media There is a social media tool kit developed by the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (Social Media Support Toolkit), which is available to Digital Community Managers and organizations like chess.com. It aids in establishing safety policies for helping individuals who are experiencing a suicidal crisis. Also, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline offers assistance with developing suicide prevention protocols. Based on communications with chess.com staff during crisis situations, I believe they may be receptive to updating their protocols. Even if they have previously utilized these sources, it appears that it is time to reevaluate the needs of the community and see what needs to be improved to better serve the needs of chess.com members. After reading a few recent threads about children seeking mental health support on the site, I found it alarming that posters were not aware of existing resources (ex. links to resources in our club). This "Emotional Support Resources" club is not enough, it looks like chess.com needs to do something like Twitch Twitch Cares: Mental Health Support & Information . Recent threads about children seeking mental health help: https://www.chess.com/forum/view/site-feedback/number-of-children-seeking-mental-health-help-pinned-locked-thread https://www.chess.com/forum/view/community/alarming-number-of-kids-turning-to-this-site-for-psychiatric-advise-or-threatening-suicide In response to those threads, I revised our private club introduction and posted it to the forums. Emotional Support: Guidance, Resources and Handling Urgent Situations: https://www.chess.com/forum/view/off-topic/emotional-support-guidance-resources-and-handling-urgent-situations If anyone is interested in contacting chess.com staff about safety protocol improvement, please let me know.

It is a form of emotional abuse if a partner threatens to harm themselves if you don't do what they want. Please checkout this source for more information about manipulative behaviors and how to respond to them: https://www.loveisrespect.org/resources/what-to-do-if-your-partner-threatens-suicide/

What if someone is actively suicidal on Chess.com? If someone is in the act of harming themselves, they need to contact emergency services. They may be disoriented and not recall the number https://www.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines or https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_emergency_telephone_numbers . Encourage them to call immediately, open their front door if they can, and stay close so that they can be reached quickly. If they do not need medical attention, please connect them with a Crisis center, this is the worldwide helpline directory: https://findahelpline.com/ (when they find their area, there is an option to connect with "Emergency Services" in the upper right hand corner if its enabled) Once they have the crisis resource they need, it may be hard, but you're going to have to disconnect. What if someone is demonstrating "concerning behavior" on Chess.com? If it is an urgent situation, this is the form to use https://support.chess.com/article/209-how-do-i-report-someone . Use the "Abuse Form" from the "Urgent" report section, this is the header: Urgent report If the person you are reporting is being aggressive, threatening violence, or any other behavior that requires an urgent response, please fill out the below form and it will be looked into immediately: Send a screenshot of posts and/or messages that show what the person has said that is cause for concern (urgent concerns like saying they are going to harm themselves or someone else). 2. Include a link to the person's profile. From the 'What happened' drop down menu choose which is closest to the situation. Explain the situation as briefly as possible and submit. What if I see suicidal messages on social media? Contact a Safety Team: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/help-someone-else/safety-and-support-on-social-media/ ***I've contacted chess.com staff to find out what actions we can take in certain situations on their site. I'll update this as soon as I have the information. Suggestions to simplify this post are welcome.

If you're in communication with someone who is in need of help but they are resistant to get it, consider checking out these resources to give you a little guidance: https://screening.mhanational.org/content/what-do-when-they-dont-want-help/ https://wayahead.org.au/get-the-facts/when-someone-needs-help-but-is-not-willing-to-get-help/

Reaching Out If you feel comfortable reaching out to the user, Take This offers these tips for talking with someone who is struggling: Listening Goes a Long Way For many people in distress, lending a calm, empathic ear can make all the difference. This means listening and reflecting what you hear in an emotionally engaged manner. It requires paying attention and being present in the face of pain and discomfort without assuming you know the answer or it is your responsibility to make it “go away.” Ask Questions Don’t hesitate to seek clarification and ask for specifics when someone wants support. Try to learn more about what they mean and what made them think of a topic rather than rushing in with answers. Gentle questioning can help a friend sort out their thoughts and come to their own conclusions. It Isn’t About You It’s easy to turn away from a friend’s distress to your own experiences with seemingly similar problems. This can end up with more talking and less listening. While sometimes helpful, it is important not to assume that your experience is similar, relevant, or that what worked for you would necessarily work for a friend. Don’t Be Afraid Not to Know It can actually be comforting to someone in need to hear that you also don’t have the answer. This can legitimize discomfort and communicate an appreciation that they have good reason for what they feel. A good friend is responsible for caring, but not for fixing. Withhold Judgment Friends can sometimes see a bad decision in process and anticipate a painful outcome. A true friend offers perspective, and may have an opinion, but will support you even when you make a mistake, and won’t shower you with “I told you sos.” People are Resilient Even a struggling person has strength and resources to cope. Communicate your belief in your friend’s capacity to tolerate distress and find their way through it. Believing in someone else often helps them believe in themselves. Trust your Instincts If a friend shows signs of a serious or unremitting problem, urge them to seek professional help. A friend knows the limits of friendship and realizes they can not take ultimate responsibility for someone’s safety or well-being. Excerpt from Twitch Cares - Mental Health Support

Teen & Youth https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/help-yourself/youth/ https://www.yourlifeyourvoice.org/pages/home.aspx Teen https://teenlineonline.org/ https://www.teenlink.org/ College & University Students https://jedfoundation.org/ Teen & 20's https://www.ditchthelabel.org/ https://www.crisistextline.org/ https://www.7cups.com/ There is hope. There is help!

Directory of 1600 Helplines https://findahelpline.com/ International Suicide Hotlines https://www.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines United for Global Mental Health https://unitedgmh.org/mental-health-support Mental Health Europe: Helplines for Youth https://www.mhe-sme.org/library/youth-helplines/ International Federation of Telephone Emergency Services https://www.ifotes.org/en/ifotes-members Befrienders Worldwide Volunteer Action to Prevent Suicide https://www.befrienders.org/ Samaritans UK https://www.samaritans.org/ Papyrus UK (for youth) https://www.papyrus-uk.org/ Young Minds: Fighting for Young People's Mental Health https://www.youngminds.org.uk/ Kids Help Phone (for youth under 20) - Canada 1-800-668-6868 Canadian Association for Suicide Prevention https://suicideprevention.ca/resources/ MAP - Mental Health for Romania https://mentalhealthforromania-map.peerconcept.com/ Speaking of Suicide A site for suicidal individuals and their loved ones, survivors, mental health professionals, & others who care https://www.speakingofsuicide.com/resources/#friends 7 Cups of Tea Global Support 24/7 Worldwide Emotional Volunteer Support Online https://www.7cups.com/