perhaps more positional than defensive but this is what I play as white.
London system. done. its super easy and solid, and darn near impossible to screw something up too badly up to the first 15 moves or so. It is considered a boring opening from white... but that sounds like its what you were looking for ;)
If you do not take advantage of your first move to grab some center and rough up Black, he will take the initiative and start slapping you around. With better skill and understanding, you can start to be more aggressive in the opening and have some fun with White.
the end position in post #21: can Black just play Nxe4 now?
Well, I'd suggest the Barcza-g3,Bg2,Nf3,0-0 and follow it up with d3(KIA). Your opponent will have problems facing you.
I previously posted a comment in favour of the English opening. I still believe the English opening is good, but lately, I have grown fond of 1 c3, the Sarragosa, which leads to Slav or Caro-Kann type positions for white in which the colours are reversed. The Slav and Caro-Kann are the most solid defences, since they combine reliablity with the chance of dynamic counterplay, are solid at all levels of play, provide excellent mobility, and tend to lead to good endgames for black.
I have a defensive style of play, and I find that 1 c3, planning to play a Slav/Caro-Kann type position as white, works well.
You could always get better at tactics. Then you wouldn't need to memorize anything...
Just to throw in my two cents, i find myself to play better as black as well. I think what you're looking for is the difference between initiative and reaction. White, obviosuly by going first, has the initiative, and black is forced to respond, having the reaction.
As white, I tend to play the Zuckertort, mainly because it gives up this initiative and leaves black in the dark as to what defense to adopt. This reverses the roles, and seeing as the Zuckertort is transpositional, you can react accordingly to their move. You can easily go into more aggressive openings, like the Colle or English, or even look at trying some reversed openings.
i play london system as black
I agree with Eric here, I ALWAYS use the Colle and if my opponent makes just one mistake, I get a middle game ending quite well for me, and a very protected king. Although this works well against skilled opponents also, making it hard for them to get to your king, and harder to break through your defence.
I actually generally use the Colle as white, and as black, I use the Colle if my opponent starts with anything apart from king pawn to d4. If they start with that, then I use the bishops opening, because it can lead to scholars mate if your opponent doesnt suspect it, and it can also lead to lots of both offencive and defencive set ups. Honestly, I dont know many openings but I find I always have good games as white with the Colle, and black.
Well you need to be careful because 1...d6 2...f5 and 1...e6 2...f5 is gonna roll you over if you just play the same moves no matter what. There is no anti system for that other than sending that c pawn to c4.
When I played the Dutch I won every game by playing e5 and pawn storming like in the KID and my opponents had no idea of what to do about it. I needed zero theory to do that.