You Can't Win

Yo artfizz, I hope that you ain't referring to me bro for I'll have to change all three points and well be just like you, spontanious!

Chess is a game - a sport - of intellectual excercise. Why do we have to put in emotions into it?

Moreover, someone may not look handsome/pretty, someone may be waiting for the other to initiate the chat (starting the chat and not getting a response is not my cup of tea - but I always respond if the opponent wants to chat - I always send a message if I cannot accept someone's invitation due to any reason), someone may not be doing a job to boast about, someone is studying in 6th grade and does not like a pat on the back by a grandfatherly person... I hope you get the drift. For that matter, women shouldn't even expect chivalry OTB. Just because someone has a cute child (or looks cute) the opponent has to under-play?

We may have personal likes and dislikings - someone does not want to play with a free member just because he/she is a paid member, someone wants to form a group with only players of the same country (or even religion), someone enjoys prying into the opponent's affairs - we have no right to impose that on the other player. We must respect the other's privacy or sentiments.

And no chess player in his/her right mind dislikes being crushed, or crushing the opponent in return - that is part of the game - no sadism is involved at all!

A related issue is whether we have more than one gear to our chess game. When playing a novice, for example, do we 'ease up' (as we might do in other sports like tennis or karate) - with the intention of providing a gentler introduction to the 'sport'.

that makes me a little sad too about the pic. did he die? and also i too have my dog who died. i miss her alot. she was really old and always had her tounge sticking out and she couldnt hear or see a little before i was born. aww i miss her and also i always wanted another dog and at a doctors place they take pictures of dogs and i put mine up there. her name is sally. i miss her :(

YOU ARE GOING TO DIE BECAUSE YOU SAID THAT! I WILL CRUSH YOU WITH MY ARMPITS ON YOUR HEAD LIKE A NUT BEING CRUSHED BY A NUT CRACKER!

YOUR PURE EVILL!!!

but your picture does remind me of my dog who died. ;(

LOL

Whenever I underestimated an opponent, I made a blunder, and in most cases lost the game. If I try to play Erik and I see his beautiful child's pic, should I make the greatest blunder of underestimating him??? 

How do we know who is strong and who is weak - especially a newcomer?

On the other hand, greeters should play easy (and give moves promptly - I almost decided to quit chess.com when my greeter abandoned the game on the 9th move) so as not to frighten away newcomers.

This principle is way to easy to lay to rest. Chess is a game of intellect, as such, any type of mental preparation is fair game. If you feel pitty for someone that pitchs you a sob story and has a picture of their child or dog, you just lost a battle in a mental war. I am myself relatively new to the game, but I rarely analyse a game that I won. If you come to the table, I will try to ground you into the floor, in the nicest way I know how. I expect that you will do me the same courtesy. If you beat me, I'll analyse the game, and I'll learn from it. If you are a novice, I'll bring every cunning tactic I have in my arsenal against you, cause then you will know what to look for. If you want me to go easy on you, play me unrated, I'll take all year explaining what i can about chess.

If I found someone deliberately "taking it easy on me", I would think they must believe my play so bad, that it is the only way I'd ever score something against them (or maybe vs Anyone!?); and probably have no other games I was winning, that would ease a loss to them. It would also feel uncomfortable to believe they might question my maturity, sportsmanship, aor ability to accept a loss.

   ... I might even resent it a bit if they had played a wonderful game & I defended wonderfully (yet should still lose it), but they suddenly begin to issue second rate moves which irreparably marr what had been a game I considered  well played, artistic & worthy of annotation until then. 

}8-<

It has happened a small number of times when I'm playing someone rated a few hundred points below me that they have hung their queen. Do I take it - and effectively end the game, or do I overlook it, play an alternative move and keep the game flowing?

Usually, I remark on it - and, depending on our relative strengths, I may give them a second chance. Sometimes, my opponent berates me for failing to terminate them with extreme prejudice. Other times they accept that this is a reasonably fair means of levelling the playing field.

Winning isn't everything.

winning isn't everything, yes artfizz you hit the nail on the head.

If winning was everything I'd just play my computer... the connections are why we play here right?

Great response Pitts. Winning isn't everything. I know I dont take it too serious, although I've been known to complain when my rating drops. I play for fun, and USUALLY accept draws even if I'm winning.

PLAYING CHESS IS ONE ASPECT OF THIS SITE

I AM HERE TO MAKE FRIENDS TOO

I WOULD LOVE TO CHAT AND SHARE WITH MY OPPONENTS.