Super demotivated by losses, how to help

He might be old to join tournaments or become a super gm but he isn't old enough to stop discovering and learning new things. Pointless? sure but what's wrong with doing it? Chess can do wonders to your brain, and you don't have to climb the ladder to get that experience. He's losing but at the same time he's learning. I'm interested to learn basketball, but I still have freedom to not join in tournaments. I just want to learn it and have fun. that's all. 

All this sounds like someone that decides to read a bunch of books on open heart surgery.  Sure they sound "smart", they know all the terminologies, they can describe what needs to be done.  But can they actually perform open heart surgery?  NO...

Its actually very easy. 

The way I see it, when my rating falls, it is not a bad thing. It is rather simply me reverting to the mean, to the rating where I naturally belong based on my aptitude and willingness to learn. I know and accept that I suck, and I lack the willpower or tenacity to improve beyond, say, 850 without stressing myself out to the point of quitting chess. (Which I did for a bit)

Hey, think of it this way. While improving is a worthy goal for any player, it is okay to just to play for fun even if that means wallowing in the sub 1000 range forever, and hey, every time you lose, your opponents tend to get easier too.

Try to find joy in other things than winning.  Like tactics and not dropping pieces.  Also there may be a fundamental strategic flaw.  I am not very good(1100) but I made the greatest leap when I stopped forcing things.  Developing carefully and watching threats was big.

Again, I’m not very good but understanding your bad habits and trying to break them can help.

Here are a couple of tips that I have. 1.) Play some daily games- I don't think you need to give up live chess, but daily chess gives you time to think and learn the game. If you find yourself frequently frustrated with your live games (like I was), you may daily is a better fit for your personality anyways. I'm living proof that some formats of chess suit people better than others. I am 1400-1500 in daily, but 900ish in rapid, and 600-700 in blitz!

2.) You need to spend some amount of time studying- it's tempting to just keep playing and waiting to get better by experience, but you should probably be spending as much if not more time studying as playing. Whether that's tactics problems, endgame problems, opening theory, positional principles, annotating your own games, or thorough analysis of GM games.

3.) Don't focus too much on ratings- that is just as true for your rating as that of your opponent. Literally nobody cares if you reach xxxx rating on chess.com. Just play your best and have fun. And don't assume that a game will be easy or hard based on your opponents rating. Always assume they will play the best move. I have beaten a player rated 1550 in daily. I have also lost to a sub 500 in blitz. Anything can happen.

4.) Know when to walk away- sometimes you need to take a break from chess. It doesn't have to be long, just a couple of days will do, but everyone, even GMs, need to from time to time. And if you haven't already, make sure you are eating and sleeping right, and getting exercise. I remember reading recently that both Magnus Carlsen and Fabiano Caruana have pointed out that taking care of the physical things was a crucial part of their training in interviews they have given. It probably is true for many of the other top players today. It just makes sense. Hope this helps.

So ...now i'm fighting for life at 800 again..while i was preparing to raise the cromium1 account back at 1100 as the freshacc, but they looked for an illegal move of mine , to publicly admit (commit suicide )))) that i have more accounts so that they can sweep the trash under the carpet... This site's matching system, being it ELO or whatever it may be will kill your pleasure for chess, that is for sure! I have to tell again, as they repeatedly delete my comments or accounts that i got stuck  1 full month in the 800 league thinking about myself i'm the most stupid being on Earth... It took me just three days and a few other new accounts to realize  that i can break that barrier easily by just playing well the first 10 games after i make a new account , then keeping the highest points account only for the time i'm fresh and focussed while playing with a regular account the rest of the days. By the time you make more accounts you can abandon the accounts with lower points and enjoy playing with virtually highest quoted  chess players and learn through experience rather then expensive lessons. The site is giving a decent analysis engine you can use for free after any login so log out and login back if you want more analysis .Take the blunders as they are ...It doesn't matter if you make 10 blunders in a game, all it counts is that the opponents blunders to be worse than yours.

The matching partners system is wrong.Equal value opponents are found in all league up to 1200 where i played.If you're a beginner as i am, Don't pay for chess lessons and don't let yourself be fooled into thinking that having a few expensive chess lessons will give you a great advantage and even make you successfull in chess championships...It takes decades to become a professional in any discipline , game, art or job on this planet.If you think you're an exception then obviously you're not reading here cause you're already a genious.  More on this, playing online with faceless partners that may cheat in any way like using engines in parallel to analyze your moves is not the same with playing on a real chess board with people. Besides you have no idea if you're playing with real humans or just a bot.You have no chance to win with a bot.

take a break from games and do puzzles instead. Then after an hour or so of puzzles, play a game. You should be much better and avoid a losing streak.

stop losing

So i spent another week in the 900 league and going down to 800 to explore the games with the  best players that chess.com is choosing me to keep me as low as possible and i can confirm that in the 800 league you have many equal value opponents as those in the 900, 1000 and 1100...Don't spent your money on useless lessons to improve your rating! For that you can simply make more accounts .For the fun of it... Just play your games!

and this timing difference is completely impossible...we had very simillar pace and i actually gave a bishop for a pawn at the end  just to force it to a draw when i suddenly saw i am f...6 minutes less time than the opponent...Your timing is outrageous sometimes...and you say that your site is ZE best...

You were not losing at the same pace. The only possibility is lag from your end. You need to pay attention to the time if you are going to play sudden death time controls.

For me, during a slump, I do this:

1. STOP. I simply stop playing for a day.

2. Play rapid chess (30/30). REALLY think about and dive into each move. Make sure you're not tired, otherwise this doesn't work too well and you'll blitz in rapid (it ends very badly).

3. Do tactics puzzles.

so....i had 2 games in 20 with an opponent with better points than me so that i can get 9 points for two times, 7 points for 18 times  and lose 9 points for 18 times... 144-162 =- 18 ... This is why i say that the site matching is rigged so that you can stay as much as possible in one league.

I'm not sure I understand what you're saying. If you're saying the rating +- changed, that is because your opponent's rating and your rating changed enough for the rating change to change.

Just keep on loving chess training no matter what. Improvement follows. That's what I did when I was much weaker. And I am doing it again and again to further improve.

it happens this way: when you get in one league...let's say you're 900...you get opponents like 880 or 899, which are almost as good as you are, but having lower points will get them 9 points for a win subsequently making you lose 9 points.If you're 900 and win against a 899 you only get 7 points. If you somehow win game after game you get slowly to 950, right?Well...90% of the opponents you get by the matching system will be below your score like 930... 949 and only 10 % maybe will be over 950...When the matching system decides it's time to give you a chance by giving you better opponents, it "happens " to send you much better opponents, like 1100 league...against whom you have lots of chances to lose... I'm analyzing continuously this system and no matter the league, being it 800, 900, 1000, 1100...it happens again and again.This is why i start preaching an illegal move like changing accounts so that people can see that it happens in all leagues with all the opponents and actually people get stuck with one league as it takes enormous effort to win game after game against hordes of lower ranked opponents, which happen to be ranked the same as you are so they struggle the same as you while the House never lose.

Well, winning more is always helpful. On a more serious note, whenever I have a continuous loss chain I just stop playing for that day to avoid getting more tilted and in turn, get more losses. Everybody has a bad day every so often.

I'd urge someone who's level is , let's say in the 1500 league... to make an experiment.Reregister with a new account as beginner like 800...and see  how long it takes him to get back in the 1500 league.Of course he's going to get there easier than me who's playing chess only for a few months and get only to max 1100 league on some "illegal" accounts , but still, i am sure it would take him some serious  efforts to get back in the 1500 league due to the matching system that will give him an enormous amount of lower ranked  opponents that will eat his points if he's tired or just not in the mood to win.

If he is not in the move to win, of course he will lose points. Everyone should understand that. It has nothing to do with the pairing system.