1,000 signs you play chess too much.

1417: You create threads like these:

Pawn Pusher 1:

PAWN PUSHER (THE KING OF PATZERS)

http://www.chess.com/forum/view/fun-with-chess/new-chess-movie-pawn-pusher---see-snapshots

Pawn Pusher 2:

PAWN PUSHER: Overcoming the Chess Addiction: 

http://www.chess.com/forum/view/general/new-chess-movie-pawn-pusher-overcoming-the-chess-addiction

PAWN PUSHER 3: THE PAWN STARS:

http://www.chess.com/forum/view/general/new-chess-movie-pawn-pusher-3-the-pawn-stars

Pawn Pusher 4: The Future of Chess:

http://www.chess.com/forum/view/general/new-chess-movie-pawn-pusher-4-the-future-of-chess

The most interesting game of chess was played here in chess.com !!!!

http://www.chess.com/forum/view/game-analysis/the-most-interesting-game-of-chess-was-played-here-in-chesscom

1418. you play chess while taking a bath or taking a dump.

1420: You read Pawn Pusher 1, 2, 3 and 4 everyday.

1421: You lose too much games :)

1422: Your favorite song is Summer knight!

You've actually considered using " Care to fianchetto my Bishop?" as a pick-up line.

1425. You think of 10 songs and they all have Knight in the title.

1. Knight Fever - Bee Gees

2. Knights Are Forever - England Dan and John Ford Coley

3. One Knight - Cliff Richard

4. I Love The Knightlife - Alicia Bridges

5. Another Knight On The Road - Sherbet

6. Knight Moves - Bob Seger

7. Even The Knights Are Better - Air Supply

8. All Knight Long - Lionel Richie

9. Knights (Feel Like Getting Down) - Billy Ocean

10. One More Knight - Phil Collins

Or Christmas!   

1429. When you make a blunder (which is often) you want to do this to your computer......

"the King is dead" by Johnny Farago is playing on your radio and it makes you lose the game you're playing!

1414   You compliment women by saying " You ROOK marvelous"!

1415. you buy a "no stress chess" set

I was playing crib a few minutes ago, and one of my opponents had two queens. I said, "too bad this isn't a game of chess, or you'd be winning!"

Last week I told my nephew that I weight 200 PAWNS....

That just means you watched a lot of SNL many decades ago. ;-)

I did!!  I ordered a "No Stress Chess Set" last year to help me teach chess to my neighbor's kid.   Warning:  it comes with cards.  That's right --it turns chess into a card game.  Seriously.  It transforms the exquisitely elegant logical purity of the ancient game of chess into something between "Go Fish" and "Bingo."

My 9 year old pupil loved it.  So I bore the stress quite bravely as long as I could, and then I "lost" the cards.  We've been having fun playing chess ever since. 

You get mad of other people when they take too long to do something because you play too much lightning

(too long = 1 second)

My wife said she going to leave me but I don't care anyway cause the board does more for me anyways 

I almost jumped up from the theater seat when that happened! LOL

I looked at my wife and said, What kind of disrespect was that? 

Climbs over the chessboard knocking off all the pieces.