Need an Opening System for Black

No this is not a notification for a blog ;-;

I need an opening for Black (there isn't a London System for Black)! And I'm too lazy to learn any theory...

Suggest an easy opening system for Black against e4

Do you mean against 1.e4?

I had a look at you opening stats. You have a decent win rate with the French Defense.

Why not stick with that?

if your opponent is white and they manage to play e5 on the first move, I'd suggest resigning

Something that isn't super theory dense against 1.e4? I mean like, if you play the French, play the Caro Kann; they have similar opening ideas

Caro is great, it's my second love

I play the Sicilian; but if you want simple I would not recommend the Sicilian.

I think the French is actually quite theory heavy and I would avoid that. e5 is not bad but the Ruy Lopez can be theory heavy (but maybe more so for White).

Caro-Kann is better than the French, but I think all very good systems require you to study them to some depth.

If you don't want to do any studying, there are less sound openings available like the Modern Defense and the Scandi which have a central idea that you can follow throughout the entire game

french

As Black you have less ability to decide the opening moves as you need to prepare for White's choice. In practice the vast majority of your games as Black are likely to be in response to 1. e4 or 1. d4 by White.

Sounds like you play the French against 1. e4, and that it is serving you well, so stick with it. Look over your games and see what lines you're facing most. For example, if you're being hit with the Advance Variation most often, then learn that line for Black first (shouldn't take too long to learn the main line set of moves; and most likely White is going to go "off book" long before you get to the end of the main lines anyway). Then, expand by looking into the next most common line you face, and learn that.
For 1. d4, again, look at your options. Are you facing the London a lot? If so, just focus on learning how to play against it until you're comfortable by finding one line that looks good to you and that you as Black make the deciding move (lots of good instructional videos on YouTube). For Queen's Gambit lines, find a declined defense, maybe something like the Slav or Semi-Slav, and focus on learning one or two lines of that. Basically, look at what you're facing, and how you're already responding, and see what line you are already starting along, and then just learn where you're going "off book" (ah, I should have done this rather than that). Opening study early on is about improving on what you're already doing.
In short, you don't want to spend all your time learning dozens of different opening lines. Your opponent is likely to go off book anyway. Rather, focus on end-game technique and middle game tactics and positional play. The latter most people find harder to understand because tactics are so concrete; i.e. if I pin here I can now take this, etc, while positional improvements are really about trying to create future potential for tactics without them necessarily materializing right away. Tactics are the opportunities that arise from the ideas behind good positional play basically things like if you've traded your light square bishop for a knight, start putting your pawns on light squares . That isn't a tactical idea, though it may require some tactical play to achieve it, or it may help you decide if a given tactic is a good idea (I could do this, which in the end is an equal exchange but it gets my pawns solidly on the light squares, or I could do this other tactic that wins me a pawn but will result in my pawns forever on the dark squares? The former means your position will get stronger as your pawns start controlling the squares to make up for the missing bishop and it frees up the movement of your dark squared bishop . And those might very well be worth much more than winning a pawn at the cost of a worse positional set up.

dont play system openings. learn real chess.

system openings will only get you so far in a chess career.

the only systems agianst e4 and the pirc/philodor and most of the other systems that are typically very bad.

tbh the pirc is quite a bad opening allthough it is playable. if white has any knowledge of the philodor he plays 3.d4 and you are worse and dont get your setup

As a french player, it is pretty theory heavy, but i dont mind that as i like to study openings. But if you dont enjoy studying so much, the scandinavian is pretty light on theory. I heard you like system openings, and I've heard the modern defense is pretty much a system, you should try that out. And against d4, kings indian is basically a system opening. Nearly whatever your opponent plays, you just play the same thing, and you can play it for white as well!

oof

Maybe... French is better than Caro obviously

Well I'll definitely try those less sound openings, it's worth the lack of memorization

stick with the french; you don't need memorization in rubenstein or winnawer or advance or exchange variations.

if your opponent plays 1. e5, uh, run

1. e5 Qxe1# 0-1

wut

Oh that's reassuring

You mean, A Counter-Opening or an Opening Defense for Black.