say it ain't slow

many say the lessons learned in chess can be applied to real world situations,well i wanna here 'em. my example of this is when i'm driving and in a hurry. i'll pull out to pass thinking it's a good move and then a semi happens to change lanes and blocks me. well then, i gotta come up with a new strategy to get ahead i think and so i go back to the drawing board and rework my initial plan to pass these slower maternalfriggers on the road. if you are an irritatingly slow driver don't bother commenting tnx.

Real life lessons learned from chess:

Tension - with women. Increasin the tension is always a good idea - don't be the one who gives in too soon - don't take that pawn; keep her guessing, build the mystery. Bring more forces into play. Keep it up. Let her be the one to trade. You know what I mean.

Material - Some people think that possessions are everything, that the more you have the better. Well, sometimes you can have more material on the board, but you'll be mated anyways son. Spirituality matters, even in chess. 

Anticipation - you must think your opponents thoughts before he even has them, and ancticipate them, and act. You see ahead of yourself a world of possibilities, make moves to eliminate the possibilities you'd hate to see come to pass.

Surprise - never underestimate the amazing potential in our actions, that can pin, skewer, fork our opponents in the most beautiful ways.

Fear - be not afraid. If you should lose this one time, learn from it and bring it with you to the next game. Life does not desire to hurt you in ways that you cannot benefit from, ultimately. This is grace and mercy.

Play - In life, oftentimes competition is between "pretend enemies". Sometimes war with friends is just what the doctor ordered - be it in video games or debates. Love of our friends does not preclude the great wrestling match that the Greek Olympics was founded on - let us learn what it means to be pretend enemies with one another.

Discipline - love and prepare for upcoming confrontation. Study, learn, become excited. Your battle is around the bend; love it beforehand, let yourself lean into solitude to learn what it is you need to defeat what comes.

Class - Learn what it means to shake hands with an opponent - to look them in the eyes and regard them as not your enemy, but your equal. Conduct yourself by the rules, by both the Law of the land as well as the Etiquette of the people. Be proud to be a player of the game (ie. alive) and cultivate respect for all other players.

Defeat - It is hard to lose, especially when we feel we've tried. Loss is an aspect of life - be it that job, or worse yet, that girl you longed for. Learn to lose graciously. Learn to regard your opponent and say "Great Game" and be genuinely happy for their victory - they earned it.

Victory - Ah, the energy of the win - nothing compares. It is not unlike all of life's successes - when a girl agrees to go on a date, when the boss promotes you, when you get that vehicle you always wanted. Learn to relish your accomplishments in such a way as they needn't be anything to rub in other's faces, but a reflection purely on your personal rating. Celebrate your successes. Look forward to them. Work for them.

Goodness, wonderful notes.

Priorities: in a choice between defending or losing a pawn, a queen, or a bishop, sometimes the most obvious is not the best choice. A stove left on in the kitchen may be more important to regard than making an early appointment. 

Intimacy: with each move, we create both strong defenses and weak spots, each time unavoidably attracting the opponent's pieces into our realm. The more we may get to know an individual, the closer that person will get to knowing these, our strengths and weaknesses, and the closer the person is to exploiting them.

fun ;)

Patience - No one will ever play this game at the exact same speed as you.  Some people are much slower than you.  Some people look at you and think you are the slow one!  It doesn't matter - rewards in chess are worth waiting for, but to make a mistake (by playing quickly) is to both reward your opponent and to waste the little time that you did spend.  "Anything worth doing, is worth doing correctly."

Now I'm off to try and convince myself to practice this!

"A bad plan is better than no plan at all"-Emmanuel Lasker. I think it's allways better to have a goal and to try to figure out how you can achieve it than to go through life aimlessly.

"One bad move nullifies 40 good ones"-Horowitz. You can make all the right decisions in life, but if you make one bad decision (start drinking/doing drugs) you can ruin everything.

Somebody forgot to double-tap.

I don't know what driving has to do with chess, though perhaps in your example, the lack of a long term strategy, and the predisposition toward unsound short term tactical attempts is leading to your undoing. I'm one who drives at the speed limit and stays in his lane. Many has been the time that a driver "in a hurry" has blown my doors off -- repeatedly -- in a stretch of road, meaning that I passed him about as often as he passed me. Obviously, his strategy was flawed.

Sometimes, the hurried you go, the behinder you get.

In chess, there is sometimes no more satisfying a victory as in a game against a swashbuckler-wannabe. He attacks, and threatens, and attacks. A methodical, positional, "slow" build up of defenses and tiny advantages can finally lead to an endgame where one can constrict the life out of the hapless bugger. What greater joy than playing for that one pawn advantage, and having that pawn be the final nail in his coffin.

By the way, I've been a "slower maternalfrigger" driver for 42 years. I've never lost any extra time by being pulled over by a cop and given a ticket. I've never lost any extra work or money by having to fight the ticket or pay the fine. I've always gotten there alive and on time (while I know many aggressive drivers who have not -- though I have lost time to attending the funeral of a close friend who drove your way). And I'll post whenever, and wherever I wish, thank you.

Lol @ the people answering posts from 5 years ago.

One of these years I'm going to have to start noticing that little tidbit of information.

:P

I catch people doing it all the time. Mostly a game of "who'll notice?" at this point.

I guess it's no coincidence that the OP was recently discussed as being the lowest rated chess.com player.

And good forum content there apparently was 5 years ago, before the Age of Trolls...

Patience-: in real life you have to have patience. you know what is really funny in day to day life i ain't that patience but in chess i'm like really slow