Scholar's Mate Opening Without Insult?

You mean like this?:

Your opponent shouldn't be insulted at all. That's called the bishop's opening and its perfectly playable and has many books on it.

The fact of the matter is, I don't care how my opponent moves, if a player wants to play that sort of thing against me, they can, but I also know that any person that tries a scholars mate against me will be torn to pieces b/c they didn't follow basic opening ideas like 1. Bring knights out early 2. Avoid bringing the queen out early 3. King safety

Oh. Qf3 is not that great of a move because it blocks for your kingside knight.

Morphy's favorite move was Qf3, but he didn't play it on the 2nd move ;)

I don't feel insulted when people do it here.  But it does look a little newbie, I guess. On Yahoo Chess, it gets really really old fast...every other idiot tries for it first.

1.e4 e5 2.Qf3 is the Napolean Opening, I think. Named because he could never keep his queen at home. I think that's a little more offbeat than 1.e4 e5 2.Bc4, which is perfectly reasonable - I play it, for instance! It has a great deal of transpositional potential and should by no means be insulting.

I'd laugh pretty hard if anyone typed "don't insult me" in the middle of a game for whatever reason.

 Good point lol

I once called someone "evil devil child" because of how he was playing. I went a step further, when he won I sent him poisoned cookies, but I suspect he fed them to ants.

No, I ate 'em. Poison and all. It gives the cookies a little extra zing of flavor.

Apparently not enough zing. 

This is the wrong way to view it -- if someone tries the scholar's mate on you, sure, be insulted, but don't expect to win, at worst it's simply a loss of tempo when they have to move their queen somewhere else, it's far from a game loosing blunder.  If you expect to win you're setting yourself up psychologically.

I wouldn't be so much insulted as I'd have no respect for them as a "player."  If a player rated higher than me opened with it, I'd just see it as a novelty opening like 1.b4 -- I wouldn't expect to win, but I'd expect an advantage out of the opening.

This post gets a thumbs up.

playing live chess on chess.com i always have people opening like this and i pretty much just laugh at them to myself and appreciate that they chose a weak opening to use.

Dear chap, please do try to spell 'lose' and 'losing' correctly. You're loosely using loosing where it doesn't belong ;)

I'm actually amazed at how often people have problems with lose and loose.  Maybe we should change the spelling of lose to luze?