The emotional component of playing chess is fascinating. Winning feels good, losing feels bad. But why? It speaks a lot to the confinements of the human ego. For me, chess got to the point where when I would lose, I would engage myself on an emotional level as deeply as possible. There was a bigger win to be had there than in just one more round of chess. A psychological inward dive to which the game of chess opens the door.
The psycholgy of losing
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It can be difficult to accept one was outmaneuvered in a game as well as a debate about the game. I have said this after a game “well i gave it away when i played this move…” perhaps a post mortem stance, to use the OP’s phrase. Or is it? One could also suggest that there are those who wish to measure their game against worthy opponents and examine their a present abilities with a desire to elevate their abilities. Others simply enjoy the game and have no motivation to improve. Both are completely valid reasons to play and improve.