Corrupt a Wish

Granted, but you lost it to a pawn.

I wish I had your light saber.

Granted but your fleet captains are all insubordinate and scoff at your orders.

I wish that I were designated as the final judge of the souls of humanity.

Granted, but only for a day.

I wish I ruled the world.

Granted, but you accidently incinerate yourself.

I wish I could turn invisible.

Granted, but you're captured and put into a giant cage.

I wish I had Superman's powers.

Granted, but Bane breaks your back.

I wish I was irresistible to women.

Granted, but you get trapped in a cage and can't see any

I wish I had £1 million

Granted, as soon as Argentina wins the second Falkland war and consequently the conversion rate drops to 1£ = 0.0000001$ after skyrocketing inflation in GB.

I wish you were my slaves.

Granted! But, you can't feed us all, so you have to let us go and you are on your own again.

I wish the sea was 30 degrees Celsius. With a red flag.

Granted. But the ice caps melt flooding thousands of miles of coast killing millions and everyone knows it was your fault. And the flag sinks.

I wish I knew everything.

Granted you get lost in thought 23 hours of the day from constent thinking and die from lack of sleep.

I wish I could create my own dimension that only I can control.

Granted, but you forget where it is.

I wish Alex Rodriguez would just go away.

Granted, but then he comes back.

I wish that the next poster explodes.

Granted but after a few months in anger management I'm back on the internet full of inner peace

I wish the moon was made out of cheese

Granted, but it is poisonous and you eat some

I wish I was a GM

Granted, but you have ALS like Stephen Hawking and everyone assumes you are using your voice computer to cheat.

I wish I didn't have to go to work today.

Granted, but it is because you are in hospital with a broken leg

I wish my wi-fi wasn't so unreliable

Granted, but only because you forgot to pay the bill and the cable company turned off your service.

I wish my avatar could make a guest appearance on the Simpsons.

Granted but the episode is lost never to be seen by the fans of said show

I wish I had a pizza flavored carrot patch