heard that one a while back:
No matter how good-natured and kind the children of your country are, but German children are Kinder. 😗
heard that one a while back:
No matter how good-natured and kind the children of your country are, but German children are Kinder. 😗
"For our tenth anniversary, I bought my wife a huge diamond ring."
"That's beautiful! What did she say to you when you presented it to her?"
"Not a single word, for the next two weeks. That was the agreement."
At a first date:
He: “I work with animals every day!”
She: “Oh how sweet! What is it that you do?”
He: “I’m a butcher.”
And it's funny how your avatar is a cat...
Two guy's walking on sidewalk they see a dog licking himself.
The first says I wish I could do that.
The second says don't you think you should ask him first!
A woman had a dog that kept humping her leg when company was around.
She took the dog to the vet hoping for a solution.
The vet offered to have her pet work with a dog trainer so that it's behavior would be modified.
The woman replied -------------------- "Actually, I was wondering if you could just clip his nails"
A guy asks for a tattoo of a $100 bill on his pe**s. Curious, the tattoo artist asks him why he would possibly want that.
He replies, "Three reasons: I like to play with my money, I like to watch my money grow, and $100 seems to be the only thing my wife will blow these days."
(I DID NOT MAKE UP THIS JOKE, I FOUND IT ONLINE SO DON'T GET ANY THOUGHTS)
Oh gosh...
Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road. I asked him, "What's the word on the street?"