My Tragic Story ;-;

Saturday, May 3rd, 2025. 7:00 AM.

I wake up. Sunbeams shine down on my face. Slowly, I get out of bed and look at the outside through my window. It’s a beautiful day. The Sun kisses the trees and flowers, and the birds sing their jolly songs.

It’s time for breakfast.

Two slices of bread. Peanut butter, jelly. They form the most exquisite dish together: the PB&J, more than just another sandwich: an experience, like music; the peanut as the bassline, the bread as the drums, and the marmalade as the main beat. A soft, sweet melody, now having materialized on the plate, its stage, resting on the table of the dining room.

Only one thing is missing: the milk. Sweeter than any other drink, like an elixir of life. I leave the table and serve myself a glass. It flows down beautifully, like a waterfall. When I’m done, the carton is empty.

I come back to the table, however, to a horrible sight. The sandwich is gone. Left and right, up and down, not a crumb is left. Nowhere to be seen. It’s like it never existed.

I couldn’t make another PB&J, because that one was just too perfect, the two breads aligned with surgical precision, the amounts of jelly and peanut just right… no replica could do it justice. I spend the morning in hunger. I still don’t know what took my sandwich, but I don’t think I want to find out. No crumbs left, complete silence… like a shadow had stolen it.

And so, my morning was miserable. And all my mornings shall be, for now I can’t enjoy a PB&J.

Oh, I thought you made it for me. Sorry.

Basix, HOW DARE YOU STEAL A MANS SANDWICH?

I charge you with no Ari for one hour for this crime

Oop, I thought you left for work /j

It was set out so nicely on a napkin that I thought it was for me. I didn't mean any harm.

It's your time to shine, Olivia.

The charges will be lifted, due to the case of John vs Sandwich

@return420 stole it 💀

And returned it on 4/20.

It was you? H-how did you get into my house? All the doors were locked, the windows sealed shut… I…

B-but it’s true! It did happen! My sandwich was gone!

I thought you lived in an apartment with Basix?

Anything is possible with a jetpack.

What? N-no, I live alone in a small Canadian town. And I have no neighbors; my house is on a hill.

Hm how did I mix you up with me?

Basix… how could you? PB&J’s are the reason I am.

How do you even know where I live?

Finders keepers?