poem 11

Light (challenge by csharpe )

I believed in you
More than what you deserved
So naïve to take  in your sweet lies
You’re the only person who made me cry

The fields I crossed just for you,
Through winter , rain and fog
But I received not one word of gratitude
Because you were colder than the coldness I just crossed

A sword behind my back ,
The coward you really are ,
Don’t you have the guts to stab me..
Face to face in my heart after all?

You have made my dreams crash,
Into a void , that I shall retrieve ,
That bitterness beyond all that you have given me
Your rendition of the world is as fake as you had been

by Phavi Kannan

(next nine words -

love , angst , betrayal , blind , anew , joy , mindblowing , truth , hug )

thanks :)

nice, i think u win the challenge

how so?

she doesn't win, it just keeps going

Poem challenge.

Your love made me blind

and filled me with angst

Your betraly might not have been so mindblowing

If you had told the truth

maybe we can start anew

But it will take more then a simple hug

to bring back the joy

New words; light, dark, cold, yellow, strong, timeless, happy, string, house

nice one red , i think its heejo's / grim's turn

I mdae it up on the spot how about that haha, I say it's grim's turn

yup , I hope he see 's itand I'll mssg that guy

sounds good

it will take me a sec. im going somewhere, what should i write bout?

New words; light, dark, cold, yellow, strong, timeless, happy, string, house

this is what you have to write about

You may join, and that is what has to be written about, must use all words

Very good Phavi.  By not rhyming, your poetry steps up a notch right off the bat.  And you are so right RedSoxpawn, it does just keep going.  We all can write poetry.  Sometimes we just need a spark to get the burn going.  I really like the way you guys support each other.  It's a nice community.  Below are nine words my son sent to me and what I did with them.  Please all of you, have some fun with this little creative exercise.

quantify  bring  unfettered  soup  lousy  glimpse  bottle  festering  quaking

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all hands on deck!

all eyes on the horizon!

the ship sails steadfastly on

through ocean blue water

as we, her willing passengers,

unfettered by the bonds

and shackles of reason

line the rail looking for whales

but see only plastic and trash

but down in the hold

where no one looks

I’ve been given a glimpse

of the festering bile

we carry forward

and with quaking hands

I dip a jar, to bring up

into the light of day

a bottle of this sordid soup

to observe what skitters and shrugs

and scuttles within

Holding a flashlight

in the dim galley,

I lean in close and hear

the strains of musicians

playing accordions,

snare drums, tubas and a saw

and watch the tiny acrobat

dressed in white dancing shoes

and pink frill riding proudly

bareback on twin seahorses

around the arena

while the ringmaster lights a hoop of flame

and looks at her expectantly.

csharpe

awesome poem , just one question tho...

I like the way that tranfers from ship to circus

nice poam phavi :)

paul211, that was so sad lol good lesson though

like the poem, paul

what poem where?