Brown Pants Marathon

Heading off to war, the Captain called to his first officer. "Bring me my red shirt!" he ordered. The 1st officer did as commanded and asked, "Why, sir, do you need a red shirt?" "Well", explained the Captain. "As Captain of this ship, I must stand tall! By wearing a red shirt, if I'm injured, the crew won't see me bleed; thus, the red shirt!" The 1st officer liked the idea and complimented the Captain and off they sailed. Later, a cry came from the Crow's nest: "Enemy to the Starboard bow! Captain! We're outnumbered, 3 to 1!" "First officer!" ordered the Captain, "Bring me my brrrooowwwn pants!" So, who is going to wear the brown pants today, Wallyjack? You ... or me? Let's find out! Starfleet ... Don't let me down on this one!