1. a4: Best Chess Opening!

Dude, don't think you know the difference between fair and unfair. You said white could kick black after 1...exd1=Q and win Chuck Norris style.

Don't think he wouldn't notice you switched the positions of his Knight and Bishop illegally.

Guys I tried your advice and it worked!!! Here's a blitz game I just played with this fantastic opening:

Conzipe: I know. Not only does the much larger gravity force compared to Earth make it a pain to lift the chess pieces from the board - the storms there lasts for like a million years! We've been playing in a hurricane the last four decades...

Drikhen: That's because you had already won.

Philipsaparano: I almost got a tear in my eye. It makes me so proud when chess prodigies like yourself utilize the best opening move in the whole universe. Sure, your opponent cheated, otherwise it would had been the usual mate in 3.

Nonetheless, you beat the unfair playing opponent with the pure, raw strength that comes with 1. a4!!. Excellent work.

Jesus wants to play a4

Your opponent was using an engine! You should report him!

After 1.a4 my opponent said:"I always lose if my opponent plays 1.a4."

Ajedrecito: Nicely done. But everyone knows that computers are cheaters. As mrguy888 pointed out; they always use an engine to calculate their next moves. I even heard that they have the nerve to bring a list of openings to their chess games...

mrguy888: I believe that the Dual Knight Trampoline Maneuver was firstly executed properly by Humphrey Bogart in Argentina 1956. Rumour has it that his opponent, Capablanca, got so badly surprised by Bogart's winning line that he quit playing chess - forever.

ROFL!  I was reading through this topic last night, and I laughed the loudest at this comment!  Thanks Conquistador, you made my evening!  :-D

Am I in another universe here? The only reason the Dual Knight Trampoline Maneuver worked in mrguy888's game is because white failed to open with a4! The versatility of 1.a4 cannot be understated. Here, black tries to transpose into a Sicilian Defense, that most hackneyed and boring of openings. Alas, the Sicilian is no match for the awesome power of 1.a4!

Sigh. The Sicilian opening. Not only is it the worst scoring defense for black ever, it also leads to complications such as forcing the bishop to deccelerate in the fianchetto position (as seen in the quality example above).

 For all of you who are scared of playing against a4, use the Magic Bag Trick. It can only be used on after your opponent's second or third move. The only line that White has a chance in is 2. Kf4:

It's amazing that despite all the evidence to the contrary, some patzers still persist in the delusion that 1.a4 is not the greatest move in the universe, and that some nonsense like 1.e4 is playable. Rubbish! I say double rubbish!! In fact, not only is 1.a4 the greatest, most awesome-ist, mindblowing move in this universe, but also in numerous parallel universes, including Symphonia, Orange Co., Calif. and the Borscht Belt! And furthermore, 1.e4 is worse than the worst....it's pond scum! The  absurd popularity of 1.e4 can be explained by a line from the Old Warrior himself, Winston Churchill: "A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth even gets it's pants on!"

ROFL

Of course, 1...a5 works as well for black as 1.a4 does for white. And especially against that laughable excuse for a move, 1.e4. Take a look at this gem:

Even against world class players, 1...a5 is crushing. In this game, a famous international playboy meets his match.

I think it's time to call in the mods. This thread keeps getting stupider by the day.