Funny Chess Jokes

Dooby1

My latest Lazy Bear Cartoon. For more, see https://www.facebook.com/lazybearcomics

mrligit

I dont get it.

mrligit

Hahaha

Now I get it

mrligit
[COMMENT DELETED]
chesspunk04

What is a chess players favourite dinosaur?

A chessosaurus.

chesspunk04

What is a chess players favourite film?

The chess players.

Conflagration_Planet
stevenhan wrote:

I was playing a game with a 1100 and he lets me fork his rooks. Shit! He exclaimed. I said, "you should have said that when you saw my rating"

Only a sicko would want to fork a rook.

 
 
 
chesspunk04

" That chess player has got no nose "

" How does he smell? "

" Awful !! "

doppelgangsterII

4 pages of the lamest attempts at humor I've ever read.  

charles_butternucker

One day, a pawn moved sideways on the board. His friend, the d-pawn exclaimed: "Hey, you can't do that!"

The chess player who overheard this conversation is now in a mental asylum.

training_account

'Threats':

'Bar Chess' (this one is for the 'get a life' people):

'Not a legal Move - Correction' or 'Chess Nerdism':

'Chess Cheerleaders':

'Extreme Chess' or 'Alternatives to Bullet':

'Queen takes Bishop':

'It always does matter':

mrligit

wow

sacrificemyking

I think chess is the one thing that should never be joked about.

sacrificemyking

Me?

sacrificemyking

How did I get my wish?

doppelgangsterII
sacrificemyking wrote:

How did I get my wish?

Y O Y does an activity that supposedly is a thinking person's activity draw so many who don't have the ability to grasp the simplest meaning in what other people say?

 

He means the so called jokes in this thread are so lousy they aren't jokes.  Ergo, chess not being joked about. 

sacrificemyking

Ok then...

My apologies, I was thrown off by the wish bit. Moment of dullness on my end.

 

I was playing chess with my friend and he said, 'Let's make this interesting.' So we stopped playing chess. - Matt Kirshen

 

Not a knee slapper but this comedian actually sued a beer company for using this joke in a commercial. Cheers.

shine5

Whob wrote:

In a park people come across a man playing chess against a dog. They are astonished and say:
"What a clever dog!" 
But the man protests: 
"No, no, he isn't that clever. I'm leading by three games to one!" 

lol

training_account

My jokes are not lame. At least i tried. You dudes are just like: "meeeh, dat sucks". You suck Tongue Out

The_Chess_Bishop

If (r•2) + (b•2) = q, I have to join a chessboard and join black or white if the team color has lost its queen, has 2 rooks and a single bishop.