Signs you're a bad chess player
Your opponent refers to you as NN.
I must be a bad chess player because I do not know what this means.
Also, When playing on a real board you are waiting for the computer to tell you wether you are making illegal moves or not.
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How fast do you calculate?
You draw in a king and queen mate position with the extra queen.
You are human. (It's just a matter of how bad).
True
you post here instead of on https://www.chess.com/forum/view/fun-with-chess/1000-signs-youre-not-a-very-good-chess-player-9163044
your skill is compared to an amoeba
I read this when I was eating 🤭🤭🤭
lol\
You capture a piece by holding your piece over and grunting "NOM, NOM, NOM!".
a4 is ur opening
When he asks me for my phone number at the end of the game, that's when we hit rock bottom and I tell myself that my opponent is really a beginner.
Chess me
https://www.chess.com/blog/Meredite/chess-me
your skill is compared to an amoeba
But you don't know what an amoeba is🤔
your skill is compared to an amoeba
But you don't know what an amoeba is🤔
Weren't those the fans of that cowboy/science show from the 50's?
All of these are true for you
Signs you are a bad chess player:
You like to compare chess to war, American football, and bingo. You thought "j'doube" was a chapter in the Kama Sutra. You are convinced a fundamental truth about the Universe is revealed in how a knight moves. You believe if you could figure out how the number 42 applies, you could solve chess. You continually find items to add to the list of signs you are a bad chess player. You've just made a move that has never been played before in 500 years of chess. Based on your play, chess program developers have added a new, lower level called, "Oops." You notice if the number assigned to your chess forum post is interesting. You often use the word "dubious." You were dissappointed to learn "average" doesn't mean "normal." You make up your own pronunciations of the last names of chess legends. You've painted smiley faces on your pawns. You are working on your own chess variant in which friendly pieces and pawns can occupy the same square. The bishops have you stumped. In another variant, a pawn can promote to yet another King. You think Fischer 960 should be called something like "herFisc 960." You also play checkers and have invented a variant, Checkers 960. Your rating goals are based on historical dates. Your ultimate goal is to reach 1776. You are currently somewhere in the Bronze Age. You've considered hating Jews but can't figure out how that will help your chess game. You've decided to move to Iceland instead. This forum made absolutely no sense to you.Agreed on what you've said!
+2 
1. You like checks too much.
2. You premove.
You are human. (It's just a matter of how bad).