Anger is RUINING my Chess [Please Help]
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Jun 9, 2020
0
#123
I usually find that my first game of the day is my best, so I find that the next games are usually worse. If I lose 3 games in a row I call it quits and come back later. Most people, if they check their won\lost record are about 50/50. Everyone has bad losses - cruising to an easy win - then carelessly losing your queen, the old queen / king pin with a knight, losing a bunch of games in a row. When it gets annoying take a break or try changing the clock. Next time you might win a bunch in a row.
Jun 11, 2020
0
#124
I came here to resolve my anger AND I JUST SEE PEOPLE TRYING TO BE WISE. IS THERE A SOLUTION.
You're pissed off because you have a bad ego.
Jun 12, 2020
0
#127
I came here to resolve my anger AND I JUST SEE PEOPLE TRYING TO BE WISE. IS THERE A SOLUTION.
Hey there, sweetie. Your words above sound angry, but your avatar looks sad, and the way you describe yourself (in French) sounds like you feel somehow powerless or small. (which is why I felt like calling you "sweetie," even though I don't know you. No offense intended -- it's just something we little old ladies sometimes do.)
I gather I might have been one of the commenters you saw as "trying to be wise." To tell the truth, I am pretty wise about feelings. And I do wish I could offer you a quick fix for those surges of anger you'd like to see resolved, but I can’t -- I’m definitely not that wise. And I agree with whoever said there’s no "one fits all” solution.
But if you do decide to start exploring your anger, I can give you a signpost to look for along the path, and it was your avatar that made me think of it.
(OK. Now, brace yourself for some more "wisdom” — or -- just stop reading here. Seriously, I mean it. I won't be at all offended if you stop. I honestly hate wasting anybody's time.)
All right, so here's the thing with anger: we all tend to think of anger as a basic human feeling, like happy, sad, excited, sleepy, hungry, embarrassed, etc. But “anger" is a really a "secondary" emotional state. Any kind of anger (from irritation to rage) is always a response to the presence of two deeper feelings: pain and fear. When anybody gets stuck in a painful place — feeling hurt, helpless, trapped, with no way out -- angry feelings are almost inevitable.
Since I have no idea what things might have hurt you and scared you in the past, I wouldn't begin to give you advice about dealing with that stuff. But if you do decide to explore it some time, here's one way to find the "solution" you're looking for. Keep an eye out for a fork in the road, where one sign reads "H & H." ("Hurt plus Helpless"), and the other says "IGGTMSOB-EiiM!" ("I'm Gonna Get That Miserable (well, you get that part) -- Even if it's Me!") And maybe some time, you'll take a chance on the "H & H" path, and ending up picking up a whole bunch of your own wisdom (always the best kind) along the way -- even having some fun in the process. I do wish you good luck.
Jesus! this still ahs comments since 2017 
Well it's relaly simple to handle, this only needs a change of how one expect to see the results.
Everyone usually feels great after victory because there was a challenge and was not only completed but won thats the usual way one focus. while the other side looks for victory cos they really feel that part important as well.
Then again if instead of focusing like that one does understand that every training gets results even if one just started at it, therefore more than the result at the board (or game) one should analyze and check what was learned on that game, what was the important moves, doing this can lvl up the game and just be happy and play more cos practice and analyzing games bring results. Good Gaming
wouldnt it be hilarious if chess ruined your anger ?...iows u won sooo much all the time that....that....oh nvm.
Aug 7, 2020
0
#131
i just broke an expensive pair of headphones out of anger because they made me lose. now i cant even listen to music to calm down
Oh dang, sounds like you got some bees in your bonnet. I tend to get squirrelier than a bangtail in a hot corral when I get all roostered up on the tanglefoot. Just don't let them curly wolves caterwaul you into an early trip to the bone orchard. They's just a buncha tender-footed whippersnappers anyhow. Y'all take care now. 🎅🏿
Sage advice from the brush 🤔
i-shot-the-sheriff wrote:
Thee_Ghostess_Lola wrote:
wouldnt it be hilarious if chess ruined your anger ?...iows u won sooo much all the time that....that....oh nvm.
i luv this kind of viewpoint
Viewpoint don't work. At the end of the day it is an anger
ada
Ha! Close on the New Jersey. I'm originally from Dickshooter Idaho. But now I run a small accounting firm in Santa Monica. It's better hours than rustlin cattle and chasing off the hornswogglers. Anywho, I hope y'all have a good one. And tistime I hope you get yourself some new headphones so you can listen to Tex Ritter when you're out there checkmating them curly wolves on the range.
OmShruti, I think old BigMun can help. If ya wanna stay above the snakes ya gotta acknowledge the corn. Don't let them old crow bait horse riders getcha barkin at a knot over a buncha flapdoodle. This here life is about havin a dang old hog killin time and not winding up in the hoosegow. Ya'll come back now ya hear?
Translation: If you want to stay healthy you have to accept the truth. Don't let those of lesser character get you distracted over useless nonsense. Life is about love and enjoyment while avoiding trouble. Stay in touch friend and take care.
I've been there myself. I've seen a lot of death and destruction and I've been to the dark side many times my friend. I was fortunate enough to get out of the dark and I usually stay out with an occasional quick trip back. I hope you find your way out. The world is a cruel place but if you look hard in the right places you'll find the beauty and kindness.
I believe we all have much more in common than we do differences. Even if "When ya look around all you see is a buncha no good yellerbellied dudes hootin and hollerin in the saloon, spinnin a buncha yarn over nothin but a buncha burnt prairie coal."
@motherinlaw would you be my mother? please
ooh