If you click on someones profile, on the top right hand side you will see add to friends list.
Click on this and a request will be sent, which that person can either accept or reject.
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Aug 19, 2008
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#3
Method #1: Pick someone at random whilst reading a topic. Click on their name; this will take you to their profile. Click on Add to My Friends List - which will send them a message inviting them to be your friend. I strongly recommend YOU DO NOT DO THIS.
Method #2. Pick someone at random whilst reading a topic. Click on their name; this will take you to their profile. Click on Leave a Message or Challenge to Play.
How does one make friends online (specifically on this site)? - good question, it's quite similar to IRL but I suppose there might be a few peculiarities in the etiquette not immediately obvious to people.
As in real life, the most basic thing that brings people together is that they have something in common, luckily for us, that step is already out of the way. Because whatever else, whomever you're interacting with on this site also loves chess. So
Don't be afraid to "put yourself out there" - be friendly in your chat windows. You'll get a few 13 year old boys that are so fearful about the world and insecure about their masculinity as that they feel the need to respond as if they're "macho" (purposefully sloppy spelling combined with a dismissive comment like "whateva" or "ur gay" are the telltail signs. Don't worry, this is very helpful as they've done you a favor.. these aren't the people with whom you're likely to have stimulating conversations with anyways.
onto the positives...
Demonstrating that you're friendly never hurts, but don't overdo it or you can offput (again, reference to real life is good here). The standard openings (gosh, was that a chess pun?) are tried and true - say hello, or good luck. Be adventurous - it's like going fishing - sometimes a witty line is the worm on the hook.
Don't immediately send a friend request just because a chat may've gone well. Play a few games, get to know them. Being friends on chess.com is like - I would like it if you were a semi-regular opponent of mine and I want to keep track of what you're up to on the site, and maybe it'll be fun if I know when you're online so I can say hello on your notes or what have you.
Finding a second commonality never hurts - like, if you like baseball then maybe a user like, oh, well, I dunno, I'm just going to make up a silly username like "Baseballfan" might be a potential friend. (hehe sorry Josh, tease, tease)
A few words to the wise: don't spam people's notes or expect that because they accepted your game request that the two of you always have to have a game together. After a while you'll settle into the right rhythm with it all, trust me.
Make jokes, ask questions, share details, post forum topics that might draw in like minds, re-challenge that opponent who you had a really close game with, peruse profiles, join groups!* and above all relax and let time take it's course; if you're on chess.com often enough, are friendly and polite, well, making friends is an inevitability you can't even avoid.
At the end of the day we're all here for fun, and we all want to get to know these weird people in far off places. So a) have it, b) be it, c) make it, d) maintain it.
Good luck Vankey
* Here are three groups that I know are welcoming and zany - I'm not a member, but I know the people in there; join one of those and get in on it, the veritable fast-track to making friends...
Rael's advice is sound on this issue.
How does one make friends on line? This is of course not a topic but a simple question which I put in here to whomsoever who can answer it, since I don´t know where to put it really.
Much obliged
vankey51