Staff question

Is there anyway to become a Chess.com staff? If so, how do you become one?

sure. here are 5 key questions to consider:

• how many pushups can you do in 60 seconds?
• what are you more afraid of: a chimpanzee with a knife, or a 2-legged tiger?
• if your grandmother were cheating on her taxes, would you report her?
• if asked to go undercover, how many languages can you speak like a native, and how many days could you survive on the ground with $11 in cash?
• what would you do if somebody spit in your face (assuming none actually got inside your eyeball - if the spit touches your eyeball that is a separate question)?

Brings back monty python memories, lol

Did you look at the tournament issue I reported in the forum, erik? 

i can do 65 pushups....

chimp

mine died anyways

i can speak 4 languages fluently and current learning 3 other.

i would punch them. 

After a little test my answer to the first question is 140 (lowsy I know but I played football today (soccer)).

At the second question, well the last chimpazee I saw with a knife was pretty kind nut I have never met a 2-legged tiger so my answer here will take some time...

At the third question: Yes, she is poor. But if it was my rich grandfather on the other hand...

At the 4th question: Languages... Well I´m pretty lowsy at this with speaking but perhaps 11 (12 if you count english but after seeing my spelling I guess its 11)

About the money, well not that long, not ewen 5h with chess mentor :( But if I only get a silver membership perhaps two months.

And the final question: I play on and win the chess game I never let things like that distract me in a chessgame (but as you said if it had touched my eyball it is completely different).

If I learn how to make more push-ups can I join?

-240

-the tiger (how's he going to catch me?)

-my grandma doesn't pay taxes.  i don't know if you can cheat on a pension... 

-I speak 15 languages and have inside men with all the local pickpocket groups. 

-roundhouse kick.  in the eye? 3 roundhouse kicks.  best keep it simple. 

• 0-I don't do push ups.  I push the Earth down.
  
• knife wielding chimp
• No
• 2 bad English and worser English
• Woman?  Marry her.
• Man?  Lock him in the same cage as the tiger and chimp.

 1, about 20...

2, what two legs? what kind of knife? too many variables to answer

3,yea....no 

4, 3 lang's...english, piglatin, and a touch of leet-speak- 4

5, yell at them in a fake language and make rude gestures with my toes

Erik, here’s my translation of your response:

The company is made up of a few uniquely suited individuals.  You’re not hiring, necessarily, but you’re always open to that one in a million, perfect fit, future employee.  Oh, and the bar is set high.

Or a more direct translation might be;  you’re looking for people who can work hard and fast, withstand every kind of craziness imaginable, and will work for $11/day. 

11/day!

You missunderstud him, he wants to see how much payed we should have. So if you can survive 70 days on  $11 guess how much and how often you get payed :)

1 well it's been 60 seconds; that would be 0, now help me up please

2 YOUR KIDDIN RIGHT? WHERE THEY AT?! BEHIND ME?! WHERE?!!

3 NO GRAMMA NO! swear I wouldn't, now help me up - can't you see that crazy-ass monkey -n- big cripple cat?

4 only foul launguage is coming to mind - and depends if $11 satisfies monkey cat duo enough to leave me alone

5 Not much really since I'm stuck down here and nobody helped me off this @#-%& ground.... ya - @#%*& r's

1. 60

2. Neither, Id fight both...at the same time...with one hand tied to my back and blindfolded.

3. Definitely

4. As many as I need to, Indefinitely I would live off the land.

5.  Assuming it was an accident I would ask for a tissue. If not I would kick them off the website.  If that wasn't enough then I would subdue the individual until they cried "uncle", or until they just cried.