A Comprehensive Guide to Dealing With Online Bullys

Ok so we all know some one who is a bully, whether it’s here in chess.com, discord, an online game chat, or somewhere else.
Now these people suck, more than most people, because they take pleasure to n bothering other people. Whether it’s self esteem, or just pure psychopathic behavior, or they just want a reaction, however there are ways to deal with these people, and today I will give you a guide on how to deal with them in general. And at the end I will give you a specialized guide on how to deal with a particularly bad bully here on chess.com.



Now let’s begin, the first thing you need to know is that when your dealing with online bully’s, unless they know you personally, they are going to use whatever they can against you, for example, here on chess.com a lot of people use rating as a way to bother people. Online Bully’s do the same thing, they will find something about you to make fun of. Unfortunately there isn’t a whole lot we can do about this, of course we can try our best to not give them anything to bother is about but that isn’t always possible. For example you can’t hide your ratings on chess.com, which is a bummer because I know a lot of people are self conscious about their rating, and would love to hide it. Our next point is a pretty obvious one, but one I will address nonetheless, simply distance yourself from the bully as much as you can, block and avoid them when you can, and this will usually stop any harassment in private messaging unless they are making alts, in which case you can report them because alts aren’t allowed.



Now we get to the important part the previous section was just the obvious solutions, now we get to the more complicated part. Occasionally a bully will find a way to constantly bother you, like follow you around in public forums and harrass you, say your not on chess.com and Alts are fine and you can’t se to block this person because of alts. Now the first thing to do Is report them, they are being abusive and need to stop. However these reports sometimes don’t do anything and the bully is not stopped, another solution is to simply stop posting in the chat or the forum, or just ignore this persons messages and block the alts as they come, eventually after the bully sees you aren’t responding for a long time, they will eventually give up. Now say your the confrontational type, good, because this is the most effective method, and even if you aren’t confrontational, you should still do this. If you don’t want to stop posting in forums all together just because of one person it’s time to fight back. The first step is getting in the mindset if not letting their insults bother you, remember it’s just some guy on the internet, he doesn’t need to get to you, you decide whether things get to you. So before you go online and confront the bully, sit down and explain to yourself out loud, that it’s just some random guy and what he says doesn’t matter. Once you feel confident and ready to confront, go online and continue things as normal until your are bothered, the first thing to try is to call out the bully, this is a suprisingly effective method on public chats and forums as it alerts anyone who is in the forum to the fact they are being a jerk, which can scare off a bully. If they persist, simply ignore them to the best of your ability, remember they want a reaction from you so the more you interact the more they will want to bother you. So if you just act as if they don’t exist eventually they will lose interest as long as you stay in the mindset if not letting their insults get to you as this is the most important part. Finally, if they still persist, then you have 2 options, and we will start with the more situational part, if you have some knowledge of them like their general age and that kind of stuff, you may need to find a way to make them mad, now this isn’t recommended as it’s the less mature option but can be very effective, and has worked for me before, it usually works on younger bully’s, teens this may not work, but younger than that you should be good, you need to find a way to them mad, or just laugh and say they are getting mad and it’s funny, this will usually make them mad or more mad than they already are. You can also express how dumb and meaningless their insults are, adding some lols and laughing emojis, to show you aren’t taking them seriously. Now you’ve flipped the sides and they are the ones being laughed at. If you continue this they will eventually realize that they aren’t getting reaction, again this is a less mature and more childish method and isn’t recommended unless your confident that it will work.


Now we move on to the most effective method. Just get off the computer or phone and silence it and do something else, turn off notifications and go play Minecraft, go on a walk, hang out with friends irl, do something irl for a while are take a long break from public chats and keep notifications off and explain to your friends and family what’s going on, they will be able to comfort and help. The internet Is amazing but it can also suck and taking a long break from the social aspect of it can be very healthy and if you just stay offline the bully will eventually get bored and move on.


And that concludes our guide, I hope it helped some of you out there, and now it’s time for our specialized guide.



This guide is a guide specifically for a particularly mean bully of chess.com whose name I will not mention. But I will describe him so you can figure out who I’m talking about. He has blitz in his name and he has a panda pfp, he has high ratings as well and he thinks he’s a genius, very narcissistic. anyway this guy is young, in middle school as he’s said in other threads and he thinks he’s the best, and will bully people because did their rating. The most effective methods are either ignoring him, or calling him out on being a jerk, the latter is more effective and has worked for me many times. Also the technique of making the bully mad and not taking them seriously works very well on him. I will give an example, in one of his topics, which you can find if you go his profile and scroll down to his topics the title has something about getting better at tactics, you will, this is one of my first encounters with him, and I decided to be a little silly and joke around, not meaning any really harm as he’s clearly a good player, he gets pretty angry and starts attacking my rating as usual. However if you read through the topic you will see I was able to make him made and eventually he blocked me because he saw he wasn’t getting the reaction he wanted. Now basically I just call him out in any forum he’s mean to people in and so far he’s stayed away, I know it was childish and immature, BUT it worked, but I suggest just calling him out and that will shut him up. I hope this helps anyone who is particularly bothered by him.



And now the guide is fully finished I hope you learned a little something, and may you
Never be bullyed again, Good Night.

eh ! 🤷‍♂️

What

What the ! ......🙀

What?!

tldr

If I engage with an online bully, is just disengage and avoid him.

Yeah I know this is just some more in depth things to do

Okay. I just hope you're not disappointed if I still don't read it. ;-)

Well that’s your lose I guess

I lose out on lots of things, haha

That’s not really something to laugh about but whatever

I could have summed this up with “grow a pair and realize it’s the internet” but ok.

I think whoever wrote all of this about bully’s should take their own advice, and instead of telling people about bully’s and how to avoid them. Go out into the world and do something worthwhile instead of talking to strangers on an online chat

I don't have a problem with the thread. It's not like he's spamming or creating a scene. You can read it or not, it's up to you.

I wrote this by myself I didn’t copy and paste it from somewhere

But what do you do if you are the bully