SFNM 1: The Trembling Platform (revised)
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Technoblade in the recovery center: if you are watching this, i am dead. *dies*
SFNM 1: The Trembling Platform
COLD OPEN
The beginning
VISUALS: DREAM AND SAPNAP ON AN OPEN PLAIN
Dream: Sapnap!
Sapnap: Yeah, what's up, Dream?
Dream: I can tell that Aphmau's an entomophobe!
Sapnap: What do you mean she is an entomophobe?
Dream: Yeah! It was just a tiny endermite, a very tiny one, but Aphmau went insane! *laughs*
Sapnap: LOL! I didn't know that she was that scared of bugs! *laughs*
GeorgeNotFound: *enters the scene* Dream! Sapnap! What’s with all that laughter?
Dream: George, we know a secret about Aphmau and we can’t stop laughing about it!
GeorgeNotFound: Okay? I’m listening.
Dream: Aphmau is an entomophobe! Like bro, it was just a tiny endermite, but she went crazy!
GeorgeNotFound: *laughs* Looks like she is so scared of bugs!
Sapnap: Common sense, right?
VISUALS: FLASHBACK OF APHMAU WITH AN ENDERMITE AND PHILZA
Aphmau: Argh! I can’t get rid of this endermite! It makes me wanna sneeze!
Philza: Don’t worry, Aphmau. It’s just a tiny mite.
Aphmau: But don’t you understand, Phil?! I almost sneezed because of it!
Philza: Yeah, so?
Aphmau: *swats the endermite* Philza, don’t you think I look beautiful?
Philza: Hmm, no?
Aphmau: *kicks Philza*
The flashback ends.
Philza: Oh, I remember! Aphmau thinks she’s the boss and we are her servants! I don’t tolerate this behavior! I’m glad you guys are my friends. Right, Technoblade?
Technoblade: Yeah?
Recovery Center
Technoblade dies to st*bbing by Grox. Dream walks up to the Recovery Center, types Technoblade and clicks on a lever. Technoblade recovers.
Technoblade: Dream! Grox st*bbed me with a sword!
Dream: What did you do to him?
Technoblade: Nothing! I feel like he hurts people for fun.
Dream walks up to Grox.
Dream: GROX! WHY DID YOU ST*B TECHNOBLADE?!
Grox: I don’t know, I just like hurting people for fun.
Dream: *breathes*
The fight
Dream: Get a life, you little cow!
Grox: Ay! What did you call me?! *slaps Dream*
Dream: Well, if you want a slap battle, here you go! *slaps Grox*
The slapping continues.
Nico: *walks up to Dream and Grox* Guys, calm down! This isn’t a slap battle!
Grox: Shut up, blue guy! I only slapped him because he accused me of st*bbing Technoblade, which I didn’t!
Dream: Don’t believe what he said. He st*bbed Technoblade! Ask him!
Nico: *walks up to Technoblade* Did Grox st*b you?
Technoblade: Yes!
Nico: *walks back to Grox* This is what you get for st*bbing Technoblade! *kicks Grox in the groin*
Grox: Ahh! Help me!
Aphmau: *walks to Dream and Grox* Guys, chill! Don’t you think I look beautiful?
Dream & Grox: No!
The TNT cannon incident
Mumbo Jumbo: Finally, I built my newest TNT cannon design! It’s simple and effective!
Mumbo Jumbo launches the TNT cannon. Unfortunately, the cannon hits GoodTimesWithScar, who is seen resting by a tree.
GoodTimesWithScar: Mumbo! What are you doing?!
Mumbo Jumbo: Oh, I’m sorry, Scar. I didn’t mean to hit you. I was only testing my TNT cannon.
GoodTimesWithScar: Oh, okay.
The sigma squad
Grox falls near Camman18, Clevooo and NotVixios.
Grox: Hey, guys! Wish to be friends? Dream and Nico framed me for stabbing Technoblade!
Camman18, Clevooo and NotVixios: Yeah! We’re so gonna get revenge on them!
NotVixios: We’re the sigma squad!
Camman18: Yeah! Let’s beat them up!
Stampy Longhead: Beat them up? That’s not very family-friendly.
Another feud
Grox: *walks up to Dream, Technoblade, Cash and Nico with his sigma squad* Haha! I got my friends here!
Nico: And I brought Cash with me too!
Sigma Squad: Let’s see who’s the strongest!
A fighting cloud appears.
Stampy Longhead: Oh no! They’re fighting! I have to write a peace treaty for them!
Stampy Longhead writes a peace treaty while they are fighting
Stampy Longhead: STOP!
Technoblade: Why? *keeps fighting*
Stampy Longhead: STOP! I WROTE A PEACE TREATY FOR YOU!
Everyone fighting: *looks at Stampy Longhead*
Stampy Longhead: You guys have to sign this.
Everyone signed the peace treaty.
Stampy Longhead: *sighs* I’m keeping this treaty onto my logbook of peace treaties. Entry #419: The Slap War Ceasefire.
Philza’s group
Philza: DanTDM! Paulsoaresjr! Wish to be friends?
DanTDM & Paulsoaresjr: Yeah!
iBallisticsquid: I’m in too!
DanTDM: Yo, guys, what are we doing?
Philza: We must get revenge on Aphmau!
DanTDM: And why is that?
Philza: She kicked me in the balls over an endermite!
iBallisticsquid: Oh, that’s bad! What are we gonna do?
The introduction of the show
A beam of light flashed down into the world.
Everyone: What’s that? A bad omen?
Notch falls down from the sky.
Notch: Hello.
Dream: Who are you?
Technoblade: Yeah, who?
Notch: I am Notch. Dream, Technoblade, you guys are chosen.
Dream & Technoblade: Why?
Notch: Well, everybody, there’s a luxury mansion out there. It’s called Notch’s Mansion. There is a casino, guest room, swimming pool, sauna and even robot servants there. And the winner even decides who gets to live in the mansion.
Dream: How much does it cost?
Notch: Not even a penny.
Dream: Then I’ll take it!
Notch: What about the others? They want it too.
Dream: I won’t give it to anyone!
Notch: Let’s settle this down with a contest. The winner gets the mansion. But not everyone is worthy of joining the contest.
Everyone: *sobs*
Notch: Calm down. Now let me separate the worthy from the unworthy.
ELIMINATION CEREMONY
Notch: The 20 worthy contestants will enter the Scramble for Notch’s Mansion, and the unworthy will be sent to the -30° Cold Loser Cage.
Philza: WHAT? NO!
EYStreem: WE’RE COOKED!
Nico: -30°? That doesn’t sound too bad, I experienced worse in Russia anyways.
Cash: I’M NOT MADE FOR THIS!
Notch: Shh! The contestants that are unworthy are Clevooo,
Grox: NO! I DON’T WANT HIM TO FREEZE TO DEATH!
Notch: Stampy Longhead,
Stampy Longhead: NO! I EVEN MEMORIZED SCRIPTS FOR MY VICTORY!
Notch: xNestorio, JeromeASF, BentReal, Philza, Cash,
Cash: OH NO! WHAT AM I GONNA DO THERE?!
Notch: And Omz, Jelly,
Jelly: Save me Jesus!
Notch: Phoenix SC, DashPum4, Nico,
Nico: Who cares? As I said before, I experienced worse in Russia.
Grox: I’m a little bit sad, but okay. At least we have three members in our sigma squad and only two bastards.
Notch: And Paulsoaresjr, Ethobot, LDShadowLady,
LDShadowLady: *moans* AHHH!
Notch: And Ssundee, and Fwhip, CaptainSparklez, PopularMMOs,
PopularMMOs: HOW COULD THIS BE? I WAS MILLIONS OF CHILDHOODS, AND YET PEOPLE STILL WANT ME IN THE -30°? AHH-
Notch: Shut your mouth. *sighs* I lost track. Now let’s see which of you get to join.
Dream: It has to be me, right?
Notch: Dream, Technoblade, DanTDM, Craftee, Aphmau, GeorgeNotFound, Sapnap, NotVixios, Crave, Camman18, Grian, Mumbo Jumbo, Parrot, EYStreem, GoodTimesWithScar, Mikecrack, Pixlrffs, PrestonPlayz and Grox.
Grox: I’m so happy there are more sigmas than bastards!
Cold Loser Cage.
Philza: WHAT? NO!
EYStreem: WE’RE COOKED!
Nico: -30°? That doesn’t sound too bad, I experienced worse in Russia anyways.
Cash: I’M NOT MADE FOR THIS!
Notch: Shh! The contestants that are unworthy are Clevooo,
Grox: NO! I DON’T WANT HIM TO FREEZE TO DEATH!
Notch: Stampy Longhead,
Stampy Longhead: NO! I EVEN MEMORIZED SCRIPTS FOR MY VICTORY!
Notch: xNestorio, JeromeASF, BentReal, Philza, Cash,
Cash: OH NO! WHAT AM I GONNA DO THERE?!
Notch: And Omz, Jelly,
Jelly: Save me Jesus!
Notch: Phoenix SC, DashPum4, Nico,
Nico: Who cares? As I said before, I experienced worse in Russia.
Grox: I’m a little bit sad, but okay. At least we have three members in our sigma squad and only two bastards.
Notch: And Paulsoaresjr, Ethobot, LDShadowLady,
LDShadowLady: *moans* AHHH!
Notch: And Ssundee, and Fwhip, CaptainSparklez, PopularMMOs,
PopularMMOs: HOW COULD THIS BE? I WAS MILLIONS OF CHILDHOODS, AND YET PEOPLE STILL WANT ME IN THE -30°? AHH-
Notch: Shut your mouth. *sighs* I lost track. Now let’s see which of you get to join.
Dream: It has to be me, right?
Notch: Dream, Technoblade, DanTDM, Craftee, Aphmau, GeorgeNotFound, Sapnap, NotVixios, Crave, Camman18, Grian, Mumbo Jumbo, Parrot, EYStreem, GoodTimesWithScar, Mikecrack, Pixlrffs, PrestonPlayz and Grox.
Grox: I’m so happy there are more sigmas than bastards!
THE FIRST CONTEST
Notch: Today, you guys have to be the last one standing on this balance beam. *teleports the 20 contestants to the balance beam*
Craftee: *sobs* I wish I was in the CLC! Life would’ve been much better!
GoodTimesWithScar: Don’t cry, Craftee. You can win the mansion if you stay on the beam for the longest!
Grox (whispers to Camman18 and Crave): C’mon! Let’s run over those bastards!
The sigma squad runs over Dream and Technoblade.
Crave: Guess who’s winning the mansion?
Notch: Only 18 contestants left.
Mikecrack: Parece que estoy hecho para esto. (Looks like I am built for this.) *hops around, energetic*
GoodTimesWithScar: MUMBO! THIS IS WHAT YOU DESERVE FOR BLOWING ME UP EARLIER! *kicks Mumbo*
Aphmau: Do you think I look beautiful?
Sigma squad: No!
Aphmau: *tries to kick Grox*
Crave: We have a better chance to win the mansion now! *kicks Aphmau*
Notch: Only 16 now.
Grox (whispers to Camman18, NotVixios and Crave): C’mon! We have to kick everyone else!
NotVixios kicked Mikecrack, EYStreem and GoodTimesWithScar.
Notch: It’s 13 now.
DanTDM (whispers to GeorgeNotFound and Sapnap): Kill these troublemakers!
GeorgeNotFound, Sapnap and DanTDM tries to run over Grox and Crave, but got resisted by Camman18 who knocked out Sapnap (Crave is out though).
Notch: Final 11.
Ethoslab: Pixlrffs, we shouldn’t try knocking out other pe- *gets run over by Grox*
Pixlrffs: *knocks out Grox*
Craftee: I don’t deserve the mansion. *jumps into the lava*
Notch: Final 8.
Grian: Pixlrffs! Target detected! Knock him! *knocks Pixlrffs*
Parrot: Knock Grian! *gets knocked instead*
Camman18: Eliminate the threats! All hail the sigma squad! *knocks Grian*
PrestonPlayz: We must team up to eliminate the sigma squad!
EYStreem: *knocks NotVixios and Camman18* The squad’s down.
Notch: Final 4.
EYStreem: *knocks GoodTimesWithScar* *gets knocked by GeorgeNotFound*
PrestonPlayz: GeorgeNotFound! Jump!
GeorgeNotFound: No, you!
Notch: You both win.
GeorgeNotFound: Yay! Does that mean that we win the mansion?
Notch: No. But you’ll get to choose the teams, and get this Team Leader medal. *awards medals to PrestonPlayz and GeorgeNotFound*