lol
The USA is like Santa Clauses evil twin that hates you and takes all your stuff
They are 100% opposite in every way, except both refuse to wear anything but red. Satan clause actually enters underground up through your furnace, takes presents for himself, then exits through the chimney, where his 8 rabid hyenas pull his Tesla. They can't fly though, quite the opposite, they travel through the subway system of hell.
You give stuff on Xmas to get that feeling of giving, but Santa’s billionaire brother, Satan Claus, prefers the feeling of being on a yacht while his elf workers make him cash. Who can blame him? Satan Claus is gonna build a wall, and make the South Pole elves pay for it!!