Why can't chess.com implement every inane reform I can think of?

  • #1

    For example, I want to make my own flag, and I want it to be 3-D, and possibly include a monkey banging some cymbals together.

    I also want a rollover forum signature that either says "thanks for reading, dawg," or "put down the cupcake, fatty," based on whether or not I've graded the member doing the reading as positive or negative (I also want that grading system implemented).

    And then there's customized victory messages for live chess; I'd like a miniature parade of field mice, all dressed in band uniforms and carrying sparkly silver balloons to march across the board whenever I win, and possibly beat up the opposing king just for emphasis (each member can have their own parade, obviously whoever wins initiates).

    And finally, I'd like to be alerted to any ongoing games, live or correspondence, whenever anyone plays an opening I've decided to study.  I'd particularly like a flashing red bulb whenever someone plays 2. Ke2.

    Come on chess.com, it's just a few lines of code!

  • #2
    This parodying is getting old.
  • #3

    Who am I parodying?

  • #4
    I thought you were parodying me, but apparently I am wrong.
  • #5

    No, you're right, I just wondered how you caught on so quickly?

  • #6
    Because you are parodying everything I do.
  • #7

    Not strictly true; I don't have nearly enough time to keep up with your output.  It's hard enough to slack off at work as much as I already do.

    (anyway this "why can't chess.com do this or that" is not solely confined to you, and frankly people complain far too much about the most inconsequentail things in these forums)

  • #8
    I am not expecting that chess.com do this, I understand that they don't have to and have other things to do.
  • #9

    So you make threads that you know have no practical purpose?  Okay, well, let me have my fun, then.  I liked the parade idea.

  • #10
    It is food for thought, not something I will get angry over if they don't implement.
  • #11

    I will get angry if I don't get my parade.

  • #12
    theoreticalboy wrote:

    I'd like to be alerted to any ongoing games, live or correspondence, whenever anyone plays an opening I've decided to study.  I'd particularly like a flashing red bulb whenever someone plays 2. Ke2.

    Come on chess.com, it's just a few lines of code!


    Heartily seconded

  • #13
    Can they add babalities?
  • #14
    checkmateibeatu wrote:
    This parodying is getting old.

     +1

  • #15
    checkmateibeatu wrote:
    This persona is getting old.

  • #16
    You say "derail a stupid thread", I say "community seizing ownership for the greater good". It's like a chess.com version of Eminent Domain.
  • #17
    Arctor wrote:
    checkmateibeatu wrote:
    This parodying is getting old.

     +1


    Oh come now, the mice were funny.

  • #18

    You had me at Blue Oyster Cult.

  • #19
    ozzie_c_cobblepot wrote:
    Can they add babalities?

    +1

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