Does sweating, burping,farting, having bad breath, stinking feet, being stoned,

drunk or naked, a vegetarian, mentally ill or a monkey, make me a better chessplayer?

There. I've consolidated all the important threads into one, for those of us who have time constrants.

Thoughts?

Being a monkey might.

No.

The correct topic title would be:

Relation between chess and sweating, burping, farting, having bad breath, stinking feet, being stoned, drunk or naked, a vegetarian, mentally ill or a monkey.

I need to stop looking at the forums.  :(

I think monkeys have attention deficit.

You are not mentioning if that hypothetical player will be male or female 

OTB, online or blitz? 

Ok, but I don't think it changes the point I was making.

Really? You want me to simplify it even more for you? Sorry, I told you I have time constraints.

Hmm, maybe I have some monkey blood, although I'm no GM on neither board nor broad.

When in doubt, throw feces!

I love the little guy on the left. He can't believe his buddy is groping a married woman. So human-like ...

Married? Ring's on the wrong digit.

Dig it?

I knew it!!

What orangutan suit?

I guess in mixed-gender matches otb a naked or farting/ burping woman might have some advantages ...

Hmmm, I'm not sure turamon. I think there isn't enough empirical evidence to say. I know from excellent sources that stoned and drunk does not make one a better chessplayer. And I think we've established that monkey's are hopeless. They have many more years of evolution before the Magnus Carlsen of the ape world appears.

lols wolfie, I am willing to test that with you. let's play an otb game or three and in the first one you play naked, in the second you'll continously fart and in the third you'll burp all the time. I guess I'll lose the first one and maybe draw the second and third ...

having bad breath will make you win the game depending on how bad it is and what range it has ...