what are we?

Troy 123.
That's true . What is a label anyway ? A way of communicating an experience that's been had .

I suppose though if we are to find a truth what more could we attain?

I spoke a while to my mum yesterday .

She talked about my niece that has anorexia and my other niece that has asperger's.

Listening to how they both struggle I noticed a common trend , both young ladies weren't accepting things as they are but rather were trying to change the world to fit themselves .

The peace we seek can only be achieved through accepting what is. after all the structure of the world is hardly going to change for us .

People who have Aspergers are not trying to change the world to suit themselves, but rather to make sense of the world as it is. I thoroughly recommend your neice's mum and dad read books by Temple Grandin who is herself Aspergers and explains what the world is like from her perspective. If everyone accepted the world as it is, no great change would ever happen, no wrongs righted, no cause fought for. Living in a contented bubble of your own and accepting everything is not practical, conflict happens and learning to deal with it is called "growing up".

Troy 124.
It's the song for Africa that Michael Jackson sung .

It's probably a blessing it doesn't haunt your memory .

Fh 127.
I get where you are coming from about my niece . You may be right , I'm sure that there is truth to what you are saying , but then I think your view may be over simplistic

My niece was talking about the way society views asperger's . Saying that she wasn't happy with things . It wasn't that she didn't understand more she was discontent and aggravated . I'll answer your second point separately .

You said "both you g ladies werent accepting things as they are but trying to change the world to suit themselves", then you say it is the way society views aspergers that she is discontented with. Society is very ignorant about autism and aspergers, so if your niece finds society doesnt understand her condition, she is right, and that would be very frustrating. Her means of finding peace would be very different to yours..i personally dont think she should just accept the world as it is, then everyone remains ignorant.

Acceptance. I'll try to be more specific in describing what I'm trying to capture .

So there is the conventional view of acceptance . As you say allowing disorder , unethical behaviour and so on . That's not the sort of acceptance I'm talking about .

I'm talking about recognising that things are the way they are . That people have differing views . That suffering does exist . That things are the way they are .

Actually Fh part of change is the initial acceptance of what is because without that acceptance there can't be a will or an effort to change anything .


A person can't find peace until they accept that what is is , and no amount of trying to convince themselves that things aren't that way will help .

I'm reminded of that article I posted earlier which said that people that can't accept the world is unfair tend to be less kind . Because they blame the victim in an effort to superimpose their view of reality of the real world . Peace is accepting what's here no matter how awful it is .

Oh Fh I've been writing my last post over about an hour . I'll respond to your 130 when I can . I kept getting interrupted.

I just saw a funny video . A lady was giving advice . A lady asked her about her daughter's business, her reply was who's business is a tree ?!

Fabulous !!!

Recognising that things are the way they are, and accepting them are different things. Acceptance implies that you are ok with it. I dont think peace can come from accepting the world no matter how awful it is..your words.

I'll catch up Fh . Thank you very much for your contributions .

I'm watching my dog , well my surrogate dog , chasing her ball at the beach and thinking about pleasure .

When I run the endorphins make me feel physical pleasure .

What is fun though? I mean how does fun happen . Is it about having a new experience ?

Could a painful thing be fun because it's new or does the experience have to be pleasurable for us to see it as fun .

Is fun just a label , pleasure just a label ?

Just stood in a massive puddle . Not fun !

I guess whatever we see as what fun is we continually repeat what we find to be fun . My dog just loves smelling the scents of other dogs and continually wants to walk to the walls . I suppose one definition of fun is something we continually repeat .

But continually pleasure becomes boring no ? We need a little bit of spark , of fight , of drama . We need a bit of a challenge , excitement . We need variety !

Some people believe that it's not natural to be with the same person all your life . Certainly if you are monogamous all your life you'll hardly have variety .

I'm not entirely sure about the truth of that . I think perhaps there is two conflicting impulses . Even a married man generally speaking is attracted to various women and physically wants them but it's also true that it's lovely being in a relationship where you feel entirely secure that you want the other person and are wanted .

Like I say I think both ways we have strong natural feelings .

So many people think they can cheat successfully and yet so many relationships fail because of cheating .

I guess people aren't logical when they are very very attracted .

I couldn't cheat on my wife though . I know I couldn't . I just feel too much love for her . I want only her !

I will catch up Fh . Sometimes I like to just express my thoughts and others catch up with who's around . It's lovely to have company and I do appreciate the contributions . Interaction is fun !

This thread is about as much fun as sitting next to a dripping tap with your hands tied behind your back while a scorpion is laying its eggs in your nose.

I think the trick here is to be the tap. Dripping. Dripping. Drip. Drop. Drip ...

I see now that when I look for choice within the outside world. I find it . Generally through I find that we seldom experience a choice in terms of our lives . Basically our behaviour is more or less automatic .

I guess when we perceive a choice is when we are unsure . When we absolutely know what to do its not really like a choice at all . Just an option

For me I find that how I can cope is to concentrate on the absence or presence of a choice whether or not to solve iro of a perceived problem .

I guess that choices exists in terms of my behaviour in relation to things outside of my own mind but I find that I see things straight if I try not to worry . I relax .

Sometimes I can see that something is so important I want to think about the decision for a while . Analyse it . In those circumstances I don't see the decision whether or bit to solve as a choice , I see it as a necessity .