i'm thinking to create a group of forum "travellers"
Looking for a travel companion around scary and dangerous chess forumssssss
Sort:
LOL ill join
lol, i found another post
http://www.chess.com/forum/view/suggestions/may-i-have-your-attention-please
quoted
It has come to my attention that while Erik and staff have created an excellent site, we have never had an emergency evacuation plan. Fires,Floods,Earthquakes. Every government has fire escape routes posted. Should we have, god forbid, a fire or some un-planned catastrosphic emergency, we NEED to be prepared. When the alarm sounds, you need to exit your thread, in an orderly fashion, in single file, preferably alphabetical, and whatever you do; DON'T PANIC. Myself and Macer will be stationed at the exit doors, handing out emergency preparedness kits. These kits will consist of 1 pencil,(no eraser), 1 roll of toilet paper to write on, 1 flashlight, a rope, a bag of M&M's, and a small transistor radio,(batteries not included), to keep you informed of any other announcements. The frequency for chess.com will be 97.3FM. After exiting, stay together as a group. In the untimelly, and unwanted death of both Erik and Kohai, I will be in command at a secret designated location. The last person exiting the forums needs to turn off the lights, and close the door. We are asking for your asistance in this matter. We also need volunteers to be thread leaders. Glorax, Winerkleiner,gg, Batgirl,Ubik, BigPoison,Dashkee,Steve212000, baddogno, Einstein THIS MEANS YOU. You have shown leadership capabilities in the past. The Ghostess Lola, and Aeatheldred will be in charge of keeping all the children together. All trools will meet in a New York sewer line, where you can designate your own leaders. PDF's will be E-mailed to you with further instructions. I beleive these emergency drills will save lives.Remedial training will be schduled for every other weekend. After the all-clear signal is given, it will be safe for you to re-enter the forums. One more thing, will the person who owns a blue VW bus, please move your vehicle. Your parked in the WRONG THREAD. SUGGESTIONS WELCOME
unquoted
take a batteries...jajajaja a rope i suppose is to be used to hang yourself on the first tree
looks like Obama's home health care kit 
double lol
Mascott - I can help you. I've had a lot of experience around here, and there's nothing I haven't encountered on these forums. I'm probably the best companion you can find.
Jun 5, 2014
0
#8
I agree. This site isn't safe. That's why i recommend carrying around your very own macer75. When confronted by a shady individual on these forums, whip out your macer75, and let it do the talking.
macer75 wrote:
Mascott - I can help you. I've had a lot of experience around here, and there's nothing I haven't encountered on these forums. I'm probably the best companion you can find.
i don't accept M&M's candies from strangers 
Sunshiny wrote:
I agree. This site isn't safe. That's why i recommend carrying around your very own macer75. When confronted by a shady individual on these forums, whip out your macer75, and let it do the talking.
Exactly! Although admittedly there are some situations where a Johnmusacha or Daniel_Pi would be more useful.
kaynight wrote:
Send me your bank details, then I will help.
yes, of course,, but only if your name is Major. John Krumm
QUOTED
Return-Path: <mjr.johnkrum11@telecomitalia.it>
Received: from 195.4.92.17, Germany, freenet Datenkommunikations GmbH, [abuse@freenet.de]
Reply-To: <major.johnkrumm01@globomail.com>
From: "Major John Krumm" <mjr.johnkrum11@telecomitalia.it>
Subject: From Major John Krumm ( Please Read )
Date: Mon, 27 Jun 2011
Dear Friend,
My name is Major John Krumm. I am an American soldier with a German background and I'm currently serving in Afghanistan. With a very desperate need for assistance, I have decided to contact you.
I found your contact particulars in an address journal. I am seeking your kind assistance to move the sum of (US$15,000,000.000) Fifteen Million United States Dollars to you, as far as I can be assured that my share will be safe in your care until I complete my service here, this is no stolen money, and there is no danger involved.
SOURCE OF MONEY:
Some money in various currencies was discovered in barrels at a farmhouse near one of Saddam old palaces in Tikrit-Iraq during a rescue operation when I was serving in Iraq, and it was agreed by Major Francis Morris and I that some part of this money be shared among both of us before informing anybody about it since both of us saw the money first.
The above figure was given to me as my share, and to conceal this kind of money became a problem for me, so with the help of a British contact working here and his office enjoy some immunity, I was able to get the package out to a safe location entirely out of Iraq to a safe place. He does not know the real contents of the package, and believes that it belongs to American medical doctor who died in a raid in Iraq, and before giving up, trusted me to hand over the package to his Family.
I want to send the package out to you for you to pick up, and I will discuss this with you when I am sure that you are willing to assist me. I will give you more details as to how this transaction will be finalized as soon as I hear from you. I've limited time to spend in Afghanistan hence our troops will soon leave here and I would appreciate your prompt reply.
God Bless you as I look forward to your positive response.\par
Truly yours,
Major. John Krumm.
Received: from 195.4.92.17, Germany, freenet Datenkommunikations GmbH, [abuse@freenet.de]
Reply-To: <major.johnkrumm01@globomail.com>
From: "Major John Krumm" <mjr.johnkrum11@telecomitalia.it>
Subject: From Major John Krumm ( Please Read )
Date: Mon, 27 Jun 2011
Dear Friend,
My name is Major John Krumm. I am an American soldier with a German background and I'm currently serving in Afghanistan. With a very desperate need for assistance, I have decided to contact you.
I found your contact particulars in an address journal. I am seeking your kind assistance to move the sum of (US$15,000,000.000) Fifteen Million United States Dollars to you, as far as I can be assured that my share will be safe in your care until I complete my service here, this is no stolen money, and there is no danger involved.
SOURCE OF MONEY:
Some money in various currencies was discovered in barrels at a farmhouse near one of Saddam old palaces in Tikrit-Iraq during a rescue operation when I was serving in Iraq, and it was agreed by Major Francis Morris and I that some part of this money be shared among both of us before informing anybody about it since both of us saw the money first.
The above figure was given to me as my share, and to conceal this kind of money became a problem for me, so with the help of a British contact working here and his office enjoy some immunity, I was able to get the package out to a safe location entirely out of Iraq to a safe place. He does not know the real contents of the package, and believes that it belongs to American medical doctor who died in a raid in Iraq, and before giving up, trusted me to hand over the package to his Family.
I want to send the package out to you for you to pick up, and I will discuss this with you when I am sure that you are willing to assist me. I will give you more details as to how this transaction will be finalized as soon as I hear from you. I've limited time to spend in Afghanistan hence our troops will soon leave here and I would appreciate your prompt reply.
God Bless you as I look forward to your positive response.\par
Truly yours,
Major. John Krumm.
====
UNQUOTED
ROFL
Mascott_e wrote:
QUOTED
Return-Path: <mjr.johnkrum11@telecomitalia.it>
Received: from 195.4.92.17, Germany, freenet Datenkommunikations GmbH, [abuse@freenet.de]
Reply-To: <major.johnkrumm01@globomail.com>
From: "Major John Krumm" <mjr.johnkrum11@telecomitalia.it>
Subject: From Major John Krumm ( Please Read )
Date: Mon, 27 Jun 2011
Dear Friend,
My name is Major John Krumm. I am an American soldier with a German background and I'm currently serving in Afghanistan. With a very desperate need for assistance, I have decided to contact you.
I found your contact particulars in an address journal. I am seeking your kind assistance to move the sum of (US$15,000,000.000) Fifteen Million United States Dollars to you, as far as I can be assured that my share will be safe in your care until I complete my service here, this is no stolen money, and there is no danger involved.
SOURCE OF MONEY:
Some money in various currencies was discovered in barrels at a farmhouse near one of Saddam old palaces in Tikrit-Iraq during a rescue operation when I was serving in Iraq, and it was agreed by Major Francis Morris and I that some part of this money be shared among both of us before informing anybody about it since both of us saw the money first.
The above figure was given to me as my share, and to conceal this kind of money became a problem for me, so with the help of a British contact working here and his office enjoy some immunity, I was able to get the package out to a safe location entirely out of Iraq to a safe place. He does not know the real contents of the package, and believes that it belongs to American medical doctor who died in a raid in Iraq, and before giving up, trusted me to hand over the package to his Family.
I want to send the package out to you for you to pick up, and I will discuss this with you when I am sure that you are willing to assist me. I will give you more details as to how this transaction will be finalized as soon as I hear from you. I've limited time to spend in Afghanistan hence our troops will soon leave here and I would appreciate your prompt reply.
God Bless you as I look forward to your positive response.\par
Truly yours,
Major. John Krumm.
Received: from 195.4.92.17, Germany, freenet Datenkommunikations GmbH, [abuse@freenet.de]
Reply-To: <major.johnkrumm01@globomail.com>
From: "Major John Krumm" <mjr.johnkrum11@telecomitalia.it>
Subject: From Major John Krumm ( Please Read )
Date: Mon, 27 Jun 2011
Dear Friend,
My name is Major John Krumm. I am an American soldier with a German background and I'm currently serving in Afghanistan. With a very desperate need for assistance, I have decided to contact you.
I found your contact particulars in an address journal. I am seeking your kind assistance to move the sum of (US$15,000,000.000) Fifteen Million United States Dollars to you, as far as I can be assured that my share will be safe in your care until I complete my service here, this is no stolen money, and there is no danger involved.
SOURCE OF MONEY:
Some money in various currencies was discovered in barrels at a farmhouse near one of Saddam old palaces in Tikrit-Iraq during a rescue operation when I was serving in Iraq, and it was agreed by Major Francis Morris and I that some part of this money be shared among both of us before informing anybody about it since both of us saw the money first.
The above figure was given to me as my share, and to conceal this kind of money became a problem for me, so with the help of a British contact working here and his office enjoy some immunity, I was able to get the package out to a safe location entirely out of Iraq to a safe place. He does not know the real contents of the package, and believes that it belongs to American medical doctor who died in a raid in Iraq, and before giving up, trusted me to hand over the package to his Family.
I want to send the package out to you for you to pick up, and I will discuss this with you when I am sure that you are willing to assist me. I will give you more details as to how this transaction will be finalized as soon as I hear from you. I've limited time to spend in Afghanistan hence our troops will soon leave here and I would appreciate your prompt reply.
God Bless you as I look forward to your positive response.\par
Truly yours,
Major. John Krumm.
====
UNQUOTED
ROFL
What exactly is an "address journal"?
RonaldJosephCote
by RonaldJosephCote
It has come to my attention, secretly from some members that chess.com has been influtrated by "dorment terrorist cells". Erik is working closely with the FBI, and we have raised the threat level from green to Defcon 2. Your safety is of utmost importance to myself and staff. If you see anyone acting suspeciously, inform the staff at once. If you see anyone hanging around, inform the staff at once. DO NOT take any action on your own. DO NOT travel in the forums alone. Travel in groups, there is safety in numbers. Camera's will be mounted in ALL threads in the near future. These forums have had weddings, funerals, fires, train wreaks, cage fights. The last thing Erik needs is the publicity that will come from a thread being blown up. PLEASE! Your assistance and co-opperation is needed in these matters. Should such a tragedy occur while your here, the walking wounded will assemble at Jac1yn's desk with your tickets in hand. Like my last thread announcement,(MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE 1), we will need volunteers to assist. If you think you have what it takes to run INTO danger instead of AWAY from it; If you have what it takes when ALL is crumbling down around you, Kohai will be taking applications on Thurs. You will also earn bonus points for this. This program is only open to current members. Muted or previously banned members are NOT eligible. You will also receive a cool chess.com volunteer badge which you must wear when posting during these periolous times. Erik will be offering life insurance to all premium members. I suggest you pay your premiums before posting. Its a complicated world, and we're not getting any younger. We are doing this to make chess.com a safe place for everyone. If you have any knowledge of these "dorment terrorist cells", notify myself or Aetheldred. We will be running point on this. Thank You!
unquoted
spies & terrorists are watching ussssss
and alliens too 
and 
-- rofl..Mr. Mulder,oops Erik, save us 
!